


Fools in Old-Style Hats and Coats

by forgetme



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Childhood Trauma, Depression, Father-Son Relationship, Fatherhood, M/M, Original Character(s), Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Pre-Canon, Single Parents, Slice of Life, Slow Build, Suicidal Thoughts, What-If, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 08:50:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 26,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5122211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forgetme/pseuds/forgetme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A simple C-Rank mission changes the lives of Dai and Sakumo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the Larkin Poem "This be the verse".

Dai emptied the contents of his pouch into the bowl and watched with pride as the young nurse's eyes widened in surprise."That's more than everything the other three teams collected put together," she exclaimed, "how did you do that?"

He winked at her, knowing full well that he stood at the perfect angle to the window for his teeth to catch the golden sunlight streaming into the room. "Experience, young lady! No one knows these forests better than I do!"

Plus, he'd done this particular D-rank mission every month for the last fifteen years, but she was new and very pretty, so Dai decided that she didn't need this information quite yet. He smiled at her instead as her slender fingers sorted the medical herbs he'd collected.

"These are extremely rare," she told him, picking out a small white flower with a purple stem and holding it up for Dai to see. "I didn't think they still grew around here anymore."

Dai just laughed. "You can find anything if you look hard enough!" Then he sobered and added, "But you have to believe that it's there first!"

The nurse nodded at him, her ponytail bobbing merrily along like a ball bouncing down a staircase.

"Thank you for your hard work. This might help us save someone's life."

"Thank _you,_ young lady, for brightening my day with your grace and youthfulness!" Would another wink be too much? Dai decided to play it safe with a thumbs-up and an even broader smile. The girl blushed again, her cheeks now the color of cherry blossoms.

Behind them, someone giggled.

As he made his way to the exit, Dai heard soft footsteps followed by a woman's whisper, "Haru-chan, don't you know who that is?"

He pulled the door shut behind him before he could hear Haru-chan's reply.

* * *

Outside Dai was greeted by fresh summer air, sunshine and the delicious smell wafting over to him from the food stands across the street. It was enough to make his mouth water and his stomach growl, however, today wasn't takeout night and Gai wouldn't be back from his mission for another two hours, so Dai knew that he had to be a good father and go home to cook dinner.

You couldn't raise a strong, healthy boy on takeout and instant noodles, after all, no matter how good the smell coming from that new ramen place was.

Dai squared his shoulders and marched on.

Or he would have, if it hadn't been for the messenger nin appearing right in front of him. As it was, Dai took a big step and almost tripped over the man crouching on the ground. He flailed for a good half-second, then caught himself and tried very hard to pretend that he had not in fact been tripping and flailing. At all.

The messenger nin cleared his throat. "Maito Dai?" He looked up at Dai with eyes that barely held an expression. Flat professionalism. Somehow their cool gaze made Dai's stomach clench. He didn't normally get messages like this. Chuunin and jounin did, but genin?

"Yes?" He swallowed his anxiety as well as he could, but still it seemed as if even the ambient noise of the street had suddenly been muted.

"The Hokage wishes to see you. You are to report to his office immediately."

Dai stared at those cold eyes and it was like someone had slapped his face. He could feel the sting, heard the ringing in his ears.

_Gai. This is what this is about. Something's happened to him!_

But no, he'd only just been at the hospital. He hadn't seen anyone injured being brought in. It'd been completely quiet. Clean, empty halls, no nurses or medics rushing past, no doctors yelling orders. Then…

_What if he's not injured? What if he's—_

_No…_ Dai's knees were about to give out under him, he could feel it. The earth seemed to have fallen off its trajectory, it was spinning out of control with him on top of it, helpless and—

_No—_

"Also, I was told to inform you that this matter does not concern your son or his mission in any way," the messenger nin droned on. "That is all."

And he was gone, leaving Dai so lightheaded with relief that he couldn't move for a few seconds, but as soon as he had recovered a little, the first thing he did was shake his fist at the cloud of smoke slowly dissolving around him.

"Next time, say that stuff first, you idiot," he shouted after the messenger, and if that made the people around him turn their heads to stare and point and giggle, Dai couldn't find it in himself to care.

* * *

The Hokage's office was flooded with sunlight, bright, warm and welcoming, and Dai strode in as confidently as he could manage. He trusted the Hokage, but this was more than unusual and it made him feel uncomfortable.

From behind his massive wooden desk, Sandaime-sama greeted him with a smile and a nod. "Dai," he said, "how are you?"

"I'm fine, Hokage-sama, thank you." Dai bowed, pausing mid-bow like he had been taught so long ago. It gave him a chance to study the polished floorboards and his own toenails. When he straightened, something about the Third's smile had changed. Dai couldn't have said exactly what it was, but it made the expression look less mild and more amused. Maybe the secret was the tiny twitch at the corner of Hiruzen-sama's mouth.

"You wanted to see me?" Dai prompted.

"Yes." The old man nodded gravely. "I think I have a mission for you. It would be a regular arrangement for the next month, at the very least. You'd have to stay in the village."

This was good news! Better news than Dai could have hoped for!

He was grinning before he even really knew it, good mood firmly restored. An important mission directly from the Hokage! It wasn't every day that this kind of thing happened to him.

"That wouldn't be a problem," Dai said quickly before Sandaime-sama could change his mind.

"It's a C-rank…" A pause. Hiruzen-sama's sharp eyes fixed on Dai's. When he continued, his voice was lower, more serious, "I take it you know about Hatake Sakumo's situation?"

Somehow, that name was the last thing Dai had expected to hear. His shoulders stiffening, he frowned at his Hokage. A genin like him wasn't likely to be involved in matters such as this.

"Sakumo-san?" he asked, as if there was a chance he'd misheard.

"He's been suspended from active duty for the foreseeable future." Sandaime-sama paused once more. He took a deep breath. Dai tried to read the look on his face, but failed miserably. "However, I don't want him… ostracized. He can still serve his village, and he's willing to. I have spoken with him on the matter, but…Dai?"

During the short explanation, Dai'd been staring fixedly at his Hokage's headgear. He didn't get it. The aftermath of what the people whispering on the street referred to as The White Fang's Last Mission… Dai had to admit that he didn't understand what all the fuss was about. Still, even he knew that he could never say something like that aloud.

Hearing his name, he snapped back to attention. Hopefully, the Hokage hadn't noticed that he'd spaced out. "Yes, Sandaime-sama?"

"What is your opinion on Sakumo's actions during his last mission?" This time the Third's stare could only be described as piercing. "I take it you know the details. There's been enough talk in the village."

"Yes… I…" Feeling the palms of his hands grow moist with sweat, Dai flexed his fingers and squared his shoulders. He was not the kind of man to back down from a difficult question! But even he could tell that that this situation had suddenly turned into some kind of test. His reply would affect more than just this assignment. However, Dai knew himself to be quite incapable of rational calculations. He couldn't weigh his options and make a smart decision based on what he thought the Hokage wanted to hear and which reply would benefit him the most. That wasn't who he was. All Maito Dai could do was say the first thing that came to mind.

"I think Sakumo-san did what his heart told him to do."

"Ah, I see." Hiruzen-sama nodded. Silence stretched between them. Only birdsong drifted in through the window, almost muted by the glass pane, it sounded very far away.

Dai swallowed, waiting for the inevitable next question. When the Third asked him whether he thought Sakumo had made the _right_ decision, what would he say? What _could_ he say? Could he lie to his Hokage?

The question never came, instead there was a low creak as Sandaime leaned back in his chair.

"As I said, it's a C-rank mission. You would have to come here in the morning, get the documents and deliver them to Sakumo's home. Then in the evening you'd go and pick them up from his house and bring them back here."

Dai blinked in confusion. That… was it? His answer had been satisfactory and he got the mission? Unable to contain his joy, Dai's face split into a wide grin.

"So I'll be transporting highly classified information? You can count on me, Hokage-sama!" He nodded his head viciously, already planning out the fastest route between the Hokage tower and the Hatake residence at the edge of the village. "If anyone wants these super-secret documents, they'll have to pry them from my cold, dead fingers first!" Dai balled his hand into a fist and raised it to eyelevel. In his mind's eye he could practically see the precious documents he would be clutching in this unrelenting grip.

"It's not—" Sandaime-sama gave him a funny look. Maybe he needed more convincing? "Dai, your dedication is truly commendable, as always," the Hokage said, frowning. "But those documents aren't… They're just low level paperwork."

"Oh…" Somewhat disappointed, Dai let his fist drop to his side. Did the importance of the documents really matter, though, he wondered. Probably not! A mission was a mission, and whatever task the Hokage gave him, Dai would fulfill it at any cost. He brightened again, spurred on by his own conviction. "Well, if anyone wants that low level paperwork, they'll have to pry it from my cold, dead fingers!"

The Third smiled. "I really hope it won't come to that, Dai."

"If it does, you can count on me, Hokage-sama," Dai shouted, hoping to convey the sincerity of his statement through sheer volume. Then he struck a pose for good measure. One hand on his hip, the other fist raised to the sky – or the roof as it were.

"I doubt that it will…" Sandaime-sama said.

"It might, and if it does-!"

"Dai," the Third interrupted gently. "You'll start tomorrow morning. Dismissed."


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm home!" Carefully, Dai elbowed the door open, stepped into the tiny apartment and kicked off his sandals.

"Welcome back, Papa!" And there was Gai already, positively bursting out of the living-room that doubled as his father's bedroom, ready to attack.

Just looking at him, Dai felt his knees go wobbly again, an aftershock from that terrible moment when he'd misinterpreted the messenger nin's words. Had his arms not been full of two large bags of takeout, he would have leapt towards his son and pulled him into a long, tight embrace.

As it was, Dai only managed to shrug awkwardly, indicating that he'd like some help carrying the food into the kitchen. "Look what I've got! We're having takeout tonight!"

Gai came to a sliding halt, the tip of his cute little nose stopping millimeters from Dai's stomach. He blinked up at his father with eyes almost perfectly round with surprise; then he took one of the bags and peered inside cautiously as if he expected a frog to jump out at him. "Takeout? From that new place everyone's been talking about? _Yes_!"

Within an instant the boy was dash-skipping into the kitchen, apparently unable to wait even as long as another second. Dai followed with a grin on his lips and a spring in his own step.

"Yeah. I bet you're disappointed that you'll miss out on my great cooking, though. But don't worry, Gai, I'll make my special curry tomorrow," he called after his son.

"Oh… okay!"

Well, Dai'd hoped for a little more enthusiasm there, but what could you do? Kids just loved greasy takeout, no matter what. Even if their dads were willing to spend hours preparing something special for them, pouring their heart and soul into the dish, they'd still probably pick some quick bite from a takeout place over their father's labor of love.

* * *

In the kitchen, Gai was already sitting at the table and fumbling with the lid on the Styrofoam container in front of him. Dai sat down opposite his son and handed him a pair of disposable chopsticks.

Steam rose in fragrant plumes as Dai peeled away the lid of his container. Spicy, hot ramen, somehow, it was exactly what he needed right now. He breathed in deep, his mouth watering in anticipation. If the ramen was going to taste as good as it smelled, they were in for a treat.

"Itadakimasu!" Gai practically chanted the word. Hands clasped and head lowered, he displayed good manners for all of five seconds before grabbing his ramen and digging in like a starving wolf. Dai didn't mind. They were at home and knowing his boy, Gai had worked hard all day, pouring his youthful sweat and blood into training. He was a chip off the old block after all.

"This is _so_ good!" Gai gasped. He sucked in a quick breath and went right back to slurping up his noodles.

It _was_ good, really, really good. Dai swallowed his first mouthful of soup, enjoying the spicy after burn on his tongue. It had been a while since they'd treated themselves to something like this.

They ate quickly, both of them; in that way they were completely alike. Gai could tuck away a lot for his measly nine years, and at lightning speed, but Dai figured it was because he was growing. Every day Gai looked taller to his dad, who dutifully and _proudly_ marked his son's progress on a dedicated spot on the wallpaper in Gai's room. Upon Gai's insistence, Dai had also marked his own height, which from then on Gai had referred to as his goal. They'd had a little celebration when Gai hit the halfway point. The memory still made Dai smile at the same time as it made him want to weep.

_He's growing up so fast!_

As if somehow Gai had telepathically understood his father's thoughts and timed his eating accordingly, he finished that very moment, set his container down and asked in that completely sweet and eager way of his, "Papa, are we going to the training grounds to practice some more?"

"No… not tonight." Dai got up and collected the empty containers to dispose of them.

And there was Gai's pouty face, eyebrows furrowed and a lip that was this close to quivering. "But I really think today I'll be able to do much better than yesterday! I can feel that I've gotten stronger!"

"I believe you, and I can't wait to see it!" Dai got a sponge out of the drawer and held it under the running faucet to get it wet. Then he turned back to Gai and winked. "But actually your papa is going on a very special mission tomorrow!" Giving the table a good wiping, he lowered his voice to a dramatic whisper,"The order came directly from the Hokage himself! He called me into his office and everything!"

Gai's eyes instantly went wide with surprise and awe. There couldn't be a more heartwarming sight in the whole world, Dai thought. "Papa…" His son's giddy tone made Dai feel like he could just sprout wings and fly up into the high heavens with joy. "Sandaime-sama made you a _chuunin_?!"

Bam. Crashing down to earth again. Why couldn't he have kept his big mouth shut?

"No… no, it's not like that. It's a C-rank…" Dai mumbled, feeling his ears grow hot. _So he still hopes that I'll make chuunin one day._ Somehow Dai found himself wishing he hadn't been confronted with this, but it was his own fault for bragging like an idiot, wasn't it?

To make everything that much worse, he now had to watch his son's face fall and his narrow shoulders slump dejectedly.

"Oh… " Gai looked down at the now shiny surface of the table, blinking at his own blurry reflection. How could a man – a father! – stand this sight? Inside, demonic claws of guilt tore at Dai's stomach. A boy as cute and loveable as Gai should never have to look this disappointed and ashamed just for being his ever optimistic and hopeful self!

"However!" he declared, hoping to cheer Gai up again. "Your dad is going to work with none other than Konoha's one and only White Fang, Hatake Sakumo! What do you say to that? Hm? Isn't that impressive?" Dai beamed, sure of himself on this one. Gai had always admired Sakumo-san – so much so that a less confident father than Dai might have become a little jealous actually - anyway this was a sure bet!

He hadn't thought it possible, but somehow Gai managed to sink even deeper into his chair. Any further down and his chin would hit the table!

"…" Silence pierced Dai's heavy heart. He'd tried to make Gai smile again, but now he looked more like he was close to tears.

"Gai? What's the matter?" he asked. "Hatake Sakumo! He's the father of your very own Eternal Rival, isn't he?" Gai didn't even look up. "So that's great, isn't it?" _What else could he say to wipe that glum look off his son's face?_ "If two fathers work together, it's only natural for the sons to grow closer, too!" he explained gravely, holding up his index finger to appear more believable. This was tried and true fatherly wisdom! "Who knows, Sakumo-san and I might become best friends! Then Kakashi-kun will probably want to train with you every day!" normally the name Kakashi was like some kind of magic word for Gai. All Dai had to say was stuff like _I heard Kakashi-kun eats broccoli every day!_ or _I'm pretty sure Kakashi-kun loves going to the dentist so much, he goes every week!_ and Gai would instantly perk up, but this time? Nothing. Not even a peep.

Gai's lips were pressed into a thin white line. Dai knew that expression. He didn't even have to look to know that his son's hands were balled into tight little fists, pushing hard enough into his thighs to leave marks.

"Gai?"

"I… lately I… I've thought about not being rivals with Kakashi-kun anymore." Gai didn't look up when he spoke, his eyes remained fixed on the table. "I think maybe it would be better if I just pick someone else…" He sounded so miserable. It wasn't just the way he sounded, though. It was what he was saying that was simply baffling to Dai, who had never expected to hear those words from his son. Since Gai had met Kakashi at the academy and been in the same class with him, he'd called Kakashi-kun his rival. It'd been four years, very nearly half of Gai's life.

"What? Why?"

"I just… Maybe it would be better to be rivals with someone from my own team…"

"But you already picked Kakashi-kun."

That got a reaction, a defiant one. "So?!" Gai looked up, and Dai could finally see the unshed tears shining in his son's eyes. "Who says I have to be his rival forever?"

Hearing so much bitterness in his boy's voice made Dai's heart hurt. He was a fool, it was true, but even he wasn't stupid enough to not know what this was about. But that it had reached the children already…

" _You_ did," he said mildly, "you said he was your Eternal Rival. That means forever."

Gai was chewing on his lips, staring down at his clenched fists.

"Gai, why did you choose him? Do you remember?"

"…Because he was the best in class… the strongest… and the coolest…"

"And is he not the best anymore? He graduated when he was five, didn't he?" Dai nodded as if to reply to his own rhetorical question. "He's already a chuunin now…"

Gai swallowed thickly, fighting tears. "But… but…" He took a deep breath and it seemed to stick in his throat. A sob that tried very hard not to be one. "Everybody hates him now!"

"Gai…"

"Nobody wants to be like him anymore! Everyone says he'll just…He'll just turn out like his father…" Gai wasn't looking at him, but Dai felt that stab of pain anyway. He didn't need to see the shame in those eyes to feel it spread under his own skin like blood from burst vessels. Sometimes you didn't need to be punched to bruise; you didn't need to be cut to bleed.

"Like father like son…" Gai mumbled, "and Sakumo-san is a traitor and a failure, so Kakashi will just become a traitor and a failure, too! And I…"

_I'm going to become a failure like you._

Dai closed his eyes for a second. He tried to breathe through the pain. Suddenly it wasn't so easy anymore.

"You said being able to protect something important to you is a true victory…" Gai's voice was rising in their tiny kitchen, filling it with his anger and despair. "That's what you said! But even though Sakumo-san protected his team, everyone still thinks he's a failure because he wasn't strong enough to complete the mission!"

"Gai…"

"So it was just a lie, wasn't it?" Gai pushed himself away from the table. His chair scraped backwards with a nails on chalkboard kind of screech. "If you're not strong enough to defeat your enemies, then you're a failure," he said bitterly, "and if your dad's a failure then you're a failure, too. So there's no point being Kakashi's rival anymore…"

"Is that really what you think?"

"It's what everybody says! Even the Hokage won't let Sakumo-san go on missions anymore!"

"Gai, just because everyone says something doesn't mean it's true. Even the Hokage isn't always right." Gai's eyes widened another fraction at that last sentence. He'd probably never heard anyone say anything like that before.

"There are times when there isn't simply one choice that's right and one that's wrong. Don't you remember what I taught you about your own rules? You're not a little baby anymore. You have to make your own rules and you have to protect what's most important to _you._ " Dai took a deep breath. "Even if others say you're wrong, _you_ have to find _your own_ way, and if they laugh at you, then you have to take that as encouragement. It just means that you're not like everyone else." He ventured a soft smile. "Maybe Kakashi-kun isn't like everyone else either…"

Gai hung his head, tear tracks on his flushed cheeks. He had grown too big for simple answers a long time ago, Dai realized. His son was a genin, the same rank as him. Gai'd graduated from the academy at age seven, unlike Dai who'd been fifteen by the time he'd finally made it. Someday Gai would surely outrank him, Dai knew that, and yet. There was no rift between them. He would never allow there to be one!

As if to prove to himself that he still could, Dai strode around the table and reached for his son, ruffling Gai's hair and marveling at its softness. So much like his mother's… Gai didn't move away, but he didn't really relax either.

"Think about it for a bit. A few days maybe…" Dai brushed a tear off Gai's cheek. "Whether you want to stay Kakashi-kun's rival is _your_ decision; _you_ have to make it."

* * *

The next morning Dai went and picked up the documents. The smallness and lightness of the bundle of files that was handed to him by a bored chuunin at the mission desk surprised him. He had expected something bigger, heavier, something all around more impressive. If there was truly no classified information to be found within those pages, then there was no real reason for his task to be ranked a C. Even a D seemed high. _This kind of thing,_ he thought, _any civilian could do it. So why?_

After what could only be described as a fairly short and uneventful stroll, Dai arrived at the Hatake residence. He paused outside the gate, taking in his surroundings. The house was old but well-kept. Only the garden had clearly seen better days. Weeds were growing, taking over, making the place look deserted.

Dai listened to the sounds of the birds and insects around him. For some reason, his heartbeat was speeding up.

All of a sudden, he had a very bad feeling about this mission.


	3. Chapter 3

Big, gray clouds hung in the sky, all bunched up into one impenetrable mass like the dust bunnies Dai regularly found under Gai's bed.

He was still standing outside the garden, in front of the gate, not quite sure what he was waiting for, but filled with an inexplicable reluctance to move forward. Annoyed, Dai shook his head to clear it and stood up a little straighter. _There is nothing to be afraid of._ How often had he said that to Gai? Back when he was three years old and refused to sleep alone…

His faith in himself restored by memories of his son clinging to him like he was the only source of safety in the whole world, Dai gave the low wooden gate a gentle push, making it swing inwards and groan on its rusty hinges. It was a painful sound; one that to Dai seemed like it might have come from a wounded animal. He stepped into the garden, and already his actions felt like an intrusion. His sandals flattened the grass under his feet; the path he chose now would be visible even long after he'd gone. Apparently, no one else had walked from the gate to the house in quite some time.

_Such an eerie atmosphere_ , he thought. A feeling of loneliness rose inside of him. Although he was still in Konoha, his _home village_ , he felt like he had somehow arrived at the end of the world. Even the sound of his own footsteps was strange to him here. The rustle of the grass unnaturally loud in his ears, just like his heartbeat and the soft _swip swip_ the fabric of his spandex suit made where it rubbed together.

He was half expecting Sakumo-san to pop out of the door and greet him – he _had_ to know someone was coming to deliver the documents, right? – but nothing of the sort happened. The shoin-zukuri style house sat there like an empty husk, the shell of a long dead turtle. Maybe Sakumo wasn't even home. And then what? Dai couldn't just leave the papers on the doorstep, could he? Low level paperwork, Sandaime-sama had told him, but that still didn't mean he could shirk his duties and run off with his task only half-fulfilled. If no one answered the door, would he have to go back and inform the mission desk clerks of his failure to carry out a mission as simple as this one? They'd laugh in his face, and even he wouldn't be able to take that as encouragement.

No, if Sakumo-san wasn't home, Dai would wait until he returned!

Dai took the last few steps in a confident stride. He would knock on the door and then he'd see.

When his knuckles connected, the simple shoji trembled under his fist. His forceful knocks resounding through the silence around him, Dai shifted uncomfortably and waited. Up above the sky rumbled as if it was trying to answer for the residents of the house.

Nothing.

Dai lifted his right arm, pressed his knuckles against the rough wood of the thin door, hesitating. Behind him, the first raindrop hit the stone steps with a deafening _plop_.

Should he knock again? Should he call out? Dai wasn't usually shy, he was the opposite, really, loud and brash and quick to burst into rooms uninvited. This time, though… This time he had this feeling in his stomach, like he was ingesting poison, like a fungus was growing in there, thin, white tendrils reaching up his throat and—

There was a scratching noise, then the clicking of claws coming closer. A shadow under the door, followed by the sound of powerful sniffing.

"Hey?" Dai bent down to get a better look, but there was really nothing to see. Still, there was no way the dog on the other side of the door wasn't able to tell he was here. And if the dog was in there, Dai thought, Sakumo-san had to be home as well, didn't he? He wouldn't leave the dog locked inside the house alone, right?

Just as Dai got his hopes up, the sniffing stopped and he could hear the dog trotting away. His shoulders slumping, he resigned himself to watch the rain for a while. At least he was under the roof.

Dai sighed and looked over his shoulder at the garden. Water had dripped down from the edge of the roof onto the stone steps. The rain had gotten so heavy within the last minute that it was more of a steady stream than a drip now, and the water had begun to flow down the steps. It seemed, however, as if the actual thunderstorm was still far away. Apart from the occasional distant rumble, there was no sign of thunder and lightning here, just the rain pelting the house and garden.

He'd completely turned away from the door to get a better look at the poor plants bending under the weight of the water when he heard the sound of the door sliding open behind him. Dai spun around, fumbling with the documents he'd almost dropped in surprise.

"I'm sorry—"

"Sakumo-san!"

They'd spoken at the same time, now they were left blinking at each other in confusion. Although the sky was more than overcast with the sun nowhere in sight, Sakumo raised his hand to shield his eyes. Dai could only gape.

The man standing in front of him didn't look like the Hatake Sakumo in his memory at all. They weren't close, of course, had never been close, but Dai had seen Sakumo around the village, and when he had, Sakumo had always looked… well, not like this.

Sakumo lowered his head, his gaze skittering to his feet like a cockroach fleeing the light. "I should have been expecting you… but I seem to have overslept… I apologize." His hair hung limply into his face, obscuring most of it from view. What Dai had seen of it before had been more than enough to get him worried, though. Gaunt cheeks, skin so pale it almost looked translucent – so much so that Dai was somewhat afraid he'd see Sakumo's bones shining through if the man stepped in front of a light bulb – with bags under his eyes that made his statement seem almost comical. Sakumo didn't look like someone who'd overslept. He looked like someone who hadn't slept in years. Someone who might not even know what sleep was.

Only his clothes fit the bill. He was wearing a t-shirt and pale blue sweatpants, both wrinkled as if they had indeed been slept in. It was the first time Dai had ever seen Sakumo out of uniform. He didn't know what to say.

Finally, after the awkward silence had lasted for too many unbearable seconds, he went for a tentative, "I'm sorry" and offered Sakumo the bundle of documents. "This is the paperwork; I'm supposed to come by tonight to pick it up again."

"Thank you." Sakumo accepted the files gracefully, then he looked past Dai into the rain. "It's raining," he observed.

"Yes," Dai said. Now what? He scratched the back of his head, wondering what was expected of him. Well, there was only one way to deal with this, wasn't there? Dai squared his shoulders and summoned up his brightest grin. "Don't worry! I, Maito Dai, am not scared of a little trickle such as this! So I'll see you tonight then! Haha!" And with that he would have stepped out into the downpour, except that Sakumo-san was frowning at him, a torn look in his dark eyes.

"You don't have to… go right now." The way he talked, in this hoarse, strained remnant of a voice made Dai wonder if Sakumo was in pain. Every word seemed to take something out of him. "I'm sure... it won't keep raining like this. If you want to wait a few minutes…" Sakumo trailed off, shrinking back into the house without spelling out the actual offer.

"That would be—" Dai didn't actually know what that would be. Incredibly awkward, probably. Sakumo, however, had already withdrawn into his dark house. Dai swallowed. _No point being pessimistic about this,_ he chastised himself, _if you're too scared to move forward, you'll never get anywhere!_

Ignoring the flutter of nervousness in his stomach, Dai took the step across the threshold and into the Hatake house.


	4. Chapter 4

Inside, the blinds were drawn so Dai had to feel his way along the wall like a blind man. After he had taken off his sandals in the tiny hallway, he found himself in a dim traditional room that made him feel like what little furniture there was should have been shrouded in white sheets. Only wispy threads of daylight leaked in through the cracks in the blinds, drawing lines of shadow onto the square pattern of the tatami.

Sakumo had sat down on a _zabuton_ in front of a low table in the middle of the room. Shoulders hunched, he was staring at the stack of documents in his hands as if he had never seen paperwork before. Maybe it was just the lack of light, but somehow Dai was getting the impression that Sakumo wasn't even seeing the files. He seemed to be looking right through them.

It felt like Dai's presence had been completely forgotten. "Sakumo-san?" he prodded tentatively.

The White Fang looked up at that, clearly more startled by Dai than he should have been."Ah… please sit," he mumbled.

"Thank you." Dai approached the table and sat down opposite his host. For a while, they both breathed the stale air, listening to the rain.

Dai, however, started to feel antsy. He couldn't just sit here, in suffocating silence, staring at the grey walls, his gaze skirting the sunken form of a man he'd admired for years. "This is some rain, huh?" he said finally, eager to dispel this terrible, gloomy feeling. When there was no reaction, he grasped for the next straw. "Sooo… Kakashi-kun is…? How is he?"

"My son is… he is not here right now." Sakumo didn't look up as he spoke. Absently, he tugged at the string that was tied around the files in his hands. "Minato-kun took him on a training trip."

"Oh? Well, there's nothing like some hot-blooded training! When's he coming back?" Feeling confident that he'd found a safe topic of conversation, Dai dared to smile at that disturbingly pale face in front of him.

He was rewarded with a frown followed by a hesitant, "… I'm not…sure."

"You're not-?" This made no sense. Had he heard that right? Dai swallowed, trying to wrap his mind around this situation. Maybe Minato had been unclear? Maybe he hadn't given Sakumo a return date? As Kakashi's sensei he could've decided to take the boy away for as long as he saw fit; perhaps he'd said something like, _We'll come back when Kakashi has mastered this jutsu_ or _In a few days I'll send you a message about Kakashi's progress, and then we'll see!_ But that kind of behavior didn't quite mesh with the impression Dai had of Minato. It seemed more like the young man had told Sakumo and Sakumo had _forgotten_.

_Or maybe he just doesn't want to tell me,_ Dai thought. _Yes, that has to be it! It's none of my business anyway!_

His smile growing frayed, he wrestled for something else to say. _"_ Whenever Gai comes back from a mission, I make his favorite dish to welcome him home!" It was true, but was it appropriate to say that? Didn't it sound like he was chastising Sakumo, telling him to be as good a father as he was? Sweat beaded on Dai's forehead. He'd been rude! "Not that I, uh… It's just that Gai really loves my curry! He can't get enough of it!"

"…" More silence. Sakumo's fingers had worked their way under the thread. Was he trying to untie the knot? It couldn't be that hard…

Dai was reaching for something to say. He didn't know why, but more than anything he wanted to bridge the distance between himself and Sakumo, to offer the other man… something.

"I'm sure you cook Kakashi's favorite all the time, too! Boys that age, they sure can eat, huh?" He laughed softly, thinking about Gai stuffing himself with his cooking. He'd never known how satisfying a simple thing like watching your kid eat could be.

For a split second Sakumo's eyes flicked up at Dai's face. _Something about that statement must have caught his attention._

"… I give him money… He buys food at the store … or he cooks for himself." Dai couldn't interpret the tone. Sakumo's voice was soft; maybe there was a hint of apology in it… or shame… "I used to…" Sakumo mumbled. "He's never been a big eater."

"Oh…" Dai looked down at his hands. He wasn't sure what to do with this information. The rain had died down to a gentle patter.

Sakumo met his eyes. The murky darkness of his pupils startled Dai, like the night sky reflected in a shallow puddle. Black. Only a spot of light dancing in the depths, drowning. "Your son? He was in Kakashi's class…?"

That was more recognition than he had dared to hope for.

"Yes! Right, we met at the entrance ceremony!" Dai nodded vigorously, instantly recalling the day in question. All parents had brought their children to the academy that day. There'd been quite the commotion in the schoolyard. Sandaime himself had come to give a speech and Dai had been so overwhelmed… Well, he remembered hugging Gai and sobbing rather loudly. Sakumo, he recalled, had been there, Kakashi at his side. The great Jiraiya himself had dropped by to congratulate the White Fang. They were friends, comrades… Others had been eager to talk to Sakumo as well, had looked at Kakashi with awe, the kids with envy. No one had spoken to or acknowledged Dai and Gai. He'd been glad about that, grateful even. That moment had belonged only to him and his son. "I was a little emotional, I guess, haha…" Sheepishly, he scratched the back of his head. "I mean, one minute you're handed this small, completely helpless creature at the hospital and you hold him in your arms and he has these tiny hands that he wraps around your finger and you're a _father_ and then, before you know it, he's going to school and—" Tears were starting to blur his vision. Dai swallowed thickly, holding them back. "Time just flies, you know?"

The sound of rain drumming on the roof. Then, "Yes… It slips through your fingers…All of it…"

"Sakumo-san—"

"There's no need… to be formal." Defeat. That was what it was. The heaviness in his voice, in his whole demeanor, those hunched shoulders, that hanging head, the slow blinks, as if his eyelids couldn't muster the strength to rise again. As if the marrow in his bones had turned to lead. "Call me Sakumo…please. I'm not… your superior,… _Dai_."

To Dai it was infuriating. Without thinking he slapped his hand down onto the table. The bang resounded in the room; at the same time, a dull sting echoed through Dai's arm. The tips of his fingers prickled.

"Don't say stuff like that! You're a jounin! And I'm a genin!" His voice was too loud in the dead house; he knew the moment he spoke that he was overstepping boundaries, and yet. _I refuse to pity you!_ That was what he thought. "You're still…" His nails biting into the soft skin of the palms of his hands, he let the sentence go unfinished. Sakumo should know… He'd fought in the war; he'd won it for Konoha, between him and the Sannin...

He was a hero.

_You're still a hero._

" _Don't_." Sakumo's hands were resting on the papers in his lap. Palms down, seemingly relaxed. He never raised his voice or his eyes, but Dai heard the edge. It was the glint of a blade in the darkness.

Silence after that, the sound of the rain had stopped.

It felt like ashes were smoldering in Dai's belly. He got up.

"I'll come back tonight," he said. "Thank you for your hospitality. I'm looking forward to working with you." He bowed deeply, stubbornly.

Then he marched out without another word.

* * *

He had nothing else to do, so he went to run a few laps around the village. The air fresh and humid around him, he didn't mind the wetness of the grass or the mud.

Thoughts of Sakumo tried to snake into his mind, but he shook them off, pushed them away, and focused on running.

* * *

In the afternoon, Gai came back from his D-rank – helping out a nearby farm – and Dai herded him to the onsen for a bath. He cooked afterwards, the promised curry, which the two of them ate while Gai told tall tales of his heroics at the farm and Dai listened like the proud papa that he was.

And yet, he couldn't help it. Looking at Gai in their small but warm kitchen, listening to the rise and fall of his voice, seeing his eyes shine with excitement, he couldn't keep the images of Kakashi-kun returning from his training at bay.

Kakashi in that cold, stale room, with that shadow of a father waiting for him.

It wasn't right.

* * *

When Dai went to pick up the documents in the evening, Sakumo intercepted him at the front gate. Even in the fading light, his pallor was shocking. He looked at Dai with distant, bloodshot eyes and handed him the paperwork with a curt nod and nothing more.

* * *

"Thank you for your hard work!" Umino-san accepted the files with her usual warm smile, putting them on the shelf behind her. Dai smiled back; he liked Umino-san and was always overjoyed when he happened to catch her shift. Tonight was no exception.

"How's your son?" he asked as she dug around behind the counter, her back to him, rifling around for his pay, her ponytail swishing left and right.

She gave a breathy laugh, "He's a handful!"

"Ah, Youth!" He grinned at her when she turned around, an envelope with his name on it in her hand.

"I wish he didn't love slimy things as much as he does. Snails and frogs and toads… whenever he finds one, he just has to bring it home!" She handed him the envelope and winked. "Here you go! Nothing slimy in here, I promise!"

* * *

_This has to be a mistake; somehow the envelopes must have gotten mixed up._

Dai stared in disbelief at the money in his hands. He'd never been paid this much for a C-rank mission.

He'd never been paid this much for _any_ mission.


	5. Chapter 5

"As much as I appreciate this, I think someone somewhere made a small mistake!" Dai was back at the mission desk the next morning, still a little sweaty from his early run  around the village with Gai. He was brandishing the envelope with the money at the bored chuunin behind the desk as he added in his most dramatic voice, "And Maito Dai is not one to steal from his village! Ha!"

The young man eyed the envelope suspiciously as if he suspected it contained an exploding tag. "Wat'cha talkin' about?" he drawled, his tongue sluggishly pushing a piece of chewing gum from one corner of his mouth to the other. Dai was somewhat appalled at his obvious lack of interest in this important matter.

"This!"he exclaimed and handed his envelope over so the chuunin could take a look. "It's clearly B-rank pay!" He was an honest person; it was important to him to be a good example for Gai, and as such he would never accept money he hadn't earned! "But I went on a C-rank mission, so!"

The chuunin barely reacted at all. He took the envelope, peeked inside, then turned it over in his hands.

"Says your name right here, doesn't it?" The young guy pointed at the writing on the paper.

Dai nodded. "Yes, but—"

"So wat'cha yammerin' on about, huh?" Rolling his eyes, the chuunin let out an exaggerated sigh. He was acting as if Dai was some kind of terrible burden unloaded on him by the cruel gods of fate.

"This _is_ your name, right?" he repeated, tapping the writing with his finger. "Maito Dai? And that's your rank, right? _Genin?_ "

"Yes, but-"

"What?" he huffed, "You think I can't read or count or somethin'?"

"No, but—" All Dai wanted was to get in a word about _honesty_ and _doing the right thing_ , something that would inspire the man sitting – or more accurately slouching – in front of him to really look into the matter and help him solve it.

"Hey, I'm a _chuunin_ , 'kay? If I tell you this is the way it's supposed to be, then that's the way it's supposed to be! And that's what the Hokage wrote down for you, so this is what you get! Got it?" Instead of waiting for Dai's reply, the mission desk nin made shooing motions with his hands. "Now get lost!"

Somewhat disappointed but not dispirited – never dispirited! – Dai collected his envelope and made his way to the door.

"Thank you!" he called over his shoulder as he waved goodbye.

* * *

On his way to get the files for Sakumo he was still confused about the matter. The amount of money he had been paid seemed wrong to him. It was too much for a C-rank, much less for one that was as simple as his current task.

Shaking his head to himself, Dai retrieved the package from the small office near the entrance to the Hokage Tower. It was so light in his hands, just a stack of files, paper that weighed almost nothing and the distance he had to walk, that wasn't exactly impressive either.

He was lost in thought, walking down the corridor towards the exit onto Tea Road, when something drifted to his ears. A familiar sequence of sounds that stood out from the background noise, from the rest of the chit chat between the shinobi coming and going around him.

" _That fucking Hatake."_

Dai stopped dead in his tracks, causing an irritated jounin to push past him with a grunt of annoyance. He turned around. The man who'd shoved him was hurrying up the stairs, taking them two steps at a time. A guard was leaning against the wall in front of the staircase. He shot Dai a sleepy glance. Everyone else looked caught up in their work…

Where had it come from? Dai shook his head. Maybe he'd just imagined it.

But as he stepped out into the busy street he couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching him.

* * *

Like the night before, Sakumo was waiting at the front gate. For some reason, Dai had hoped that he'd look better after a refreshing night of sleep, but if anything, Sakumo actually seemed to have gotten worse. The dark circles under his eyes stood out against his paper white skin like creeping shadows. He was the very picture of misery. In the harsh light of day, the greasiness of his hair, a detail Dai hadn't noticed the previous day, became painfully obvious as well. And he was still wearing the same wrinkled outfit.

"Good morning…" he mumbled out of the corner of his mouth, accepting the files from Dai with as much enthusiasm as if he had been handed a death sentence.

Dai smiled. He put all his energy into the expression, hoping it could somehow be transferred like a spark of electricity, that the other man would be infected somehow. Sakumo, however, was slinking away before Dai even had the chance to return his greeting properly.

Disappointed again, Dai let his shoulders sag and pulled a face. No, he couldn't let gloominess win! He straightened again, instantly, and forced the smile to return to his face. This day had just begun, after all! He wouldn't let it be ruined by someone else's bad mood! Besides, it was Gai's day off! They were in for a whole ten hours of hot-blooded training! What could be better than that?

* * *

By the time Dai arrived at the training grounds, Gai was already in the middle of doing sit-ups. Proud of his son's diligence, Dai stood at the sidelines to watch for a bit.

"500!" With that Gai let himself fall back into the grass, panting but grinning to himself.

_Such a display of youthful effort!_ Dai was close to tears, and their training hadn't even started yet!

"Gai!" he called as he ran over, pretending he'd only just got back from his mission because the boy had been so absorbed in his solitary exercise and somehow Dai didn't want to break that illusion. He liked the image too much, a young boy, training by himself in a field still wet with morning dew! It was too beautiful!

"Papa!" Gai jumped up and ran towards him, a huge smile on his face. They met in the middle of the field, in a hug that was close to a collision. Dai wrapped his arms around his son, crushing him against his chest, his eyes bright with unshed tears, while Gai squeezed back as hard as he could. For a second it felt like the sun was rising behind them, bathing the area in dramatic light. Of course, that didn't really happen, but to Dai it seemed like it did and that was enough. He held on tight, letting the tears flow freely.

Somewhere close by, someone gagged.

Reluctantly, Dai let go of Gai and looked around. Had someone gotten sick? Was there a medical emergency? Did they need his help?

All he could see was a chuunin instructor who was herding five children from the academy towards one of the bigger training fields. Despite their teacher's efforts, the group had stopped, though, and was standing at the edge of their field, one little girl pointing and the others gaping.

"Anko-chan, don't do that," the chuunin hissed, glancing at Dai and grabbing the girl's other hand to pull her away.

Dai grinned and waved. "Thank you for being inspired by us!" he called after the retreating group.

When he turned around, Gai was frowning a little, the way he often did – he was a much too thoughtful and serious boy!

"Okay, let's warm up!" Because he just couldn't help himself, Dai reached over and ruffled his son's hair, making Gai squirm.

"Are we going to spar today?" Expertly, Gai had twisted out of his grip. He stepped back and put his hands on his hips, shoulders straight and chest puffed out, all serious. "Because I'm ready!" he declared.

_He's too adorable!_ Glowing with fatherly pride, Dai drew back his fist and punched his son square in the face, sending the boy flying into the grass.

"Gai, you idiot, don't go saying you're ready and then drop your guard like that!" he yelled.

"Argh… I'm sorry, Papa! I should have known better!" Gai pushed himself up on his elbow. With his free hand he rubbed the bright red spot on his cheek where Dai's fist had connected. It looked like it hurt, but Gai was made of stern stuff. He just grimaced a little and got back on his feet. Dai hurried over to help him.

"Don't apologize, my son! It's normal for a young man in the Springtime of his Youth to make mistakes!" he said, putting a fatherly hand on his son's shoulder. "And don't worry, we'll definitely spar! But first, let's run twenty laps around the training field!"

"Yes, Father!" His eyes alight with the fire of youth, Gai set off towards the edge of the forest, towards the sun that peeked out at them from behind the spiky treetops. Smiling a private smile, one that wasn't meant to impress or cheer up anyone else, one that was nothing more than an expression of his own genuine happiness, Dai followed his boy's lead.

* * *

After their long spar, they lay next to each other in the grass, their hearts pumping wildly. Tired, but grinning. Absentmindedly, Dai rubbed a sore spot on his chest where Gai's foot had caught him earlier. His son's kicks were getting more powerful every day. The thought made his grin that much wider, _brighter_.

For a moment until, suddenly, he found himself thinking of that day.

The day that was coming, approaching in long, unstoppable strides. The day Gai would beat him.

_I'll have nothing left to teach him then._

_No, that's not true. There's still one thing._

He closed his eyes. Twin suns had burned their bright neon shadows into his retina. They swam in the darkness behind his eyelids.

Next to him, Gai's breathing was getting slower and deeper.

Time to take him home.

* * *

Although Dai had run right to Sakumo's house as soon as he had dropped Gai off, the sun had set by the time he made it past the gate and to the front door. A sliver of moon was visible above when Dai knocked softly, wondering if Kakashi-kun was back yet, whether he might be waking the boy up.

A light was on in the living-room; it bled through the cracks in the blinds, only to be swallowed by the darkness surrounding the house.

The shouji opened slowly. Two fingers wide, just enough for Sakumo to peer out with one eye. Dai found the sight – this slice of a person he was allowed to see – a little unnerving. It reminded him of a sokushinbutsu sneaking a glance out of his tomb.

"I'm sorry," Sakumo said, his voice slightly stronger than the previous day, "can you wait a moment? I'm not quite finished yet."

And with that the shouji moved again, gradually obscuring what little he'd been allowed to see, shutting Dai out.

_No_ , he thought. _Not like this._

Without further thought – there was no time – Dai shoved his hand into the narrow opening and pulled.

"Your door must be stuck, Sakumo-san," he said jovially, feeling the other man's startled resistance. "Let me help you!"

"What?... no…that's-"

Dai, however, already had his foot in the door. It took only one last push and he was inside, grinning, playing the socially inept, oblivious oaf by wandering past Sakumo into the house. "If you want, I can help you!"

"That's not…"

Dai toed off his sandals and went into the living-room, aware of Sakumo, who was trailing after him, and, Dai noticed to his surprise, actually glaring at him. It was the first real expression that wasn't a general sort of bland misery he had seen on the other man's face. Somehow, being glared at now by this man pleased Dai immensely.

"Please go right ahead and make yourself at home," Sakumo drawled behind him, and the edge of sarcasm in his voice made Dai smile.

"Thank you!" he replied, plopping down at the table as if he was indeed a member of the family. Unperturbed by Sakumo's glare, he began to sort the papers that covered the table's surface.

"Most of this looks done to me," Dai said, waving one of the filled in forms to illustrate his point. Sakumo promptly marched over and snatched it out of his hand.

"I said I was almost done," he snapped. Then a little calmer, "Please don't trouble yourself." He kneeled down on his pillow and quickly reached over to Dai's side to collect all the paper and bring them to his side, as far away from Dai as possible.

"Is Kakashi-kun back from training yet?" Dai asked conversationally.

"No." Sakumo had grabbed a pen and was using it to viciously attack the poor form in front of him. He didn't even raise his head when speaking to Dai.

"Hm," Dai looked around the room, his eyes skirting its dark corners and fixing on a framed picture on the wall. A young couple on their wedding day. Sakumo-san in hakama next to his beautiful wife in her kimono. Dai wanted to get up and take a closer look, but he had the feeling that Sakumo would actually kick him out of the house if he tried. So he looked at the papers again.

Sakumo had built a messy stack out of the files by his elbow. Some loose pages were still strewn across the table, most of them facedown. Idly, Dai picked one up and turned it over. A D-rank mission report. Absolutely nothing special about it. He put it back down, feeling strangely disappointed. With nothing else to do than to listen to the furious scratching of Sakumo's pen, Dai looked at the other forms as well. He put one down, and picked up another that was so similar they might as well have been all the same one over and over.

Except for the fifth one he picked up, turning it over and scanning the report without really reading it. It was different. It was different because there was something scribbled into the upper right corner. In pencil someone had written, _Scum like you should be dead._

Biting back a gasp, Dai glanced furtively at Sakumo, who was still bent over his work, oblivious to everything around him.

Dai moved slowly, on instinct. His eyes fixed on Sakumo, he put the report down on the table and moved as if to grab another one. The new one he slid across the table until it was on top of the first one. He picked up both and very carefully used the second report as a shield behind which he folded the first report into a small rectangle that he could slip into his sleeve.

He very nearly sighed in relief when it was done.

"I think I'll go and get some fresh air after all," Dai announced a few seconds later.

"Hn, I'll be finished in a minute."

"Good! I'll be waiting outside." Feeling like the piece of paper in his sleeve was going to burn a hole into the fabric of his suit, Dai practically jumped to his feet and made a beeline for the exit.

* * *

His heart didn't stop pounding until he was outside, the night greeting him with a cool breeze and the calming sounds of the nearby forest.

Dai closed his eyes and took deep breath.

He had no idea what to do about the sick feeling in his stomach.


	6. Chapter 6

_It was rare for Dai to see the other parents when he went to pick up Gai from training – mostly because the boys were genin now and therefore old enough to walk home by themselves, but also because the others were usually busy with missions. So in a way he was happy to see Ebisu's parents and Genma's mother standing under the trees at the edge of the field, deep in conversation._

_He walked over leisurely, observing the boys' intense training as he went._

_Only when he was within arm's reach of Ebisu's old man, Ookuni , did he realize that everyone was looking as if they'd just taken a sip of spoiled milk._

" _What's with the gloomy attitudes?" he asked, sidling up to Ookuni and slapping him on the back in his most friendly manner. Ookuni made a choking noise, but remained on his feet. Dai took that as a good sign. "You should watch your children with proud smiles on your faces! They're burning with the passion—"_

" _Dai-kun. Please be quiet." Ookuni interrupted, wrinkling his nose in distaste. "Before you decided to barge in, we were in the middle of discussing a grave matter. It's not something you would understand." He folded his arms across his narrow chest and proceeded to glare self-importantly at Dai._

_For all of a second, until his wife rammed her elbow into his unprotected side, making him gasp in shock, his eyes bulging._

" _Ookuni, is this how you talk to your fellow shinobi? Sandaime-sama would be appalled. I hope you're teaching Asuma-kun better manners than that." She waved her index finger into her husband's face as she spoke, then she turned to address Dai. Instantly, her stern expression was replaced by a sweet smile. "It's been a while, Dai. Please excuse my husband's rudeness. It's good to see you! Gai-kun's taijutsu has become very impressive! That's quite the relief; I'll sleep easier knowing I can count on him to guard my useless son's back!" As usual Kamuya talked like a waterfall, words pouring out in one steady rush. Unlike her husband she was a people person, as a special jounin working at the academy, coordinating teachers and students and parents all day, she probably had to be._

" _Thank you, Kamuya-san!" Dai beamed at her, his chest swelling with pride. "But I'm sure Ebisu-kun will be fine! After all, he was at the top of his class when he graduated!"_

_In reply Kamuya let out a long-suffering sigh. "Ahhh, but he's such a wimp, this kid… Yesterday he complained about his bathwater being too hot! Can you believe that?" She leaned in for a stage whisper, shielding her mouth with her hand, "He takes after his dad…"_

" _Wife!" Ookuni hissed, his thin hard face contorted in anger and frustration._

_Kamuya whipped around gracefully like a dancer, brushing a strand of dark hair out of her eyes and batting her long lashes. "What is it, darling?" Her voice was dripping innocence._

" _Uh..." A blush spread across the bridge of Ookuni's nose. Whatever he had wanted to say was forgotten, wiped away with one brush of his wife's delicate hand. She stroked his shoulder, sharing a private smile with him._

_Samayako-san cleared her throat. She'd been standing at the sidelines, watching quietly all this time as she was wont to do. Dai had glanced at her again and again during his exchange with Ebisu's parents, but she'd remained silent, her eyes glued on the boys chasing each other across the field._

_Now the tiniest of apologetic smiles graced her face. "I'm sorry, but Genma and I were about to leave, Ookuni-senpai, Kamuya-neesan, Dai-kun… It was nice meeting you." She bowed, one arm held stiffly at her side while the other sleeve of her long coat dangled empty. She'd lost the limb in the war._

_Startled out of his daze, Ookuni took a step toward her. "Wait, we haven't—" Even Dai could see her eyes narrowing. Ookuni was wise enough to try a different approach, a softer tone. "You were about to explain what kind of punishment he will receive…" That had sounded almost deferential._

_But it did nothing to deter Samayako, who spared Ookuni merely a dismissive glance._

" _I'm sorry, Senpai, but there must have been some kind of misunderstanding. I was not about to do any such thing. Nothing has been decided yet, and even if it had been, it would not be my place."_

_She turned to the field again; ready to call out her son's name, and Dai had that sinking feeling he always had when he saw her leave. She was beautiful and a widow, and sometimes he hoped—_

" _But—" Again Ookuni was elbowed by his wife._

" _Stop pestering poor Samayako-chan, dear! You'll find out soon enough." She shrugged, her expression suddenly tired. "It's not like it matters anyway. Punishing him won't undo the damage that's been done."_

_Samayako was hesitating, her eyes darting from the distant figure of her son to Ookuni who had whipped around as if he'd been stung by a bee._

" _How can you say it doesn't matter? Of course it matters! He has disgraced our village! He-" Mid-outburst, Ookuni seemed to have run out of words. Frantically, he looked over to Samayako for support. "Samayako, you understand, don't you?" When she averted her eyes wordlessly, Ookuni finally looked at him as a last resort. "Dai-kun?"_

_He'd missed it. Most of the conversation had been nothing but a pale background to Samayako's graceful form. Dai's ears were growing hot under Ookuni's desperate stare. The women, too, were looking at him, waiting for his reply._

_Dai could only laugh self-consciously, scratching the stubble on his cheek. "Uuuuh… What is this about exactly?" he asked._

_For a moment, Ookuni's face lost all color, then it exploded into a bright shade of red._

" _You mean… you don't even know?!"_

* * *

It seemed far away now, that moment, although it had been a mere week ago. Dai stood on the cool porch, gazing up into the ocean of stars above him and wondered silently how the passage of time since then must have felt to Sakumo. Incredibly long? Or fleeting?

He wasn't the kind of man to think deep thoughts, he knew that, but sometimes—

Behind him, the shouji slid open with an ugly scraping sound, and Sakumo cleared his throat.

"I'm done," he said, offering the files, neatly tied into a package with a piece of string.

Dai knew the moment he'd accept them, Sakumo would be gone, back into the dusty house, into the stale, miserable air.

Dai, though, was feeling especially bold tonight; maybe it was thoughts of Samayako's predator-eyes and heart-shaped face, but he wouldn't let Sakumo go that easy. He'd had _thoughts_ under a beautiful night sky and his heart was telling him that there were things he had to do.

"Come out here!" he said and grabbed not the paperwork but Sakumo's pale wrist, pulled him over the threshold and into the night.

"What are you doing?" it sounded more tired than upset, which was a disappointment.

"It's a beautiful night!" Dai declared. "When was the last time you looked at the stars?"

Sakumo didn't reply. His wrist was cool and clammy in Dai's grip; it felt like he was fishing a drowned body out of the water.

"I don't have time…" he mumbled after a while, tugging a little in a feeble attempt to get Dai to release him. Dai only held on tighter.

"When was the last time you _ate_?"

"It's none of your business." For the first time, Sakumo actually held Dai's gaze. His eyes were harder than Dai had expected, sharper. The whites milky, but the pupils deep and polished. If he hadn't been _Maito Dai_ , he would have let go.

"Do you want to fight?" he asked instead. A spar with the White Fang, the thought set his heart ablaze.

_I'm not afraid of you._

But then Sakumo's arm went slack and his eyes dropped to the ground again. "Just leave me alone…"

With his free hand, Dai relieved Sakumo of the documents. The little rectangle of paper hidden in his sleeve poked him when he moved. "I can't. I'm on a mission," he said and tucked the files under his arm so he could put his hand on Sakumo's shoulder. The man twitched, but didn't look up. _Fine,_ Dai thought, _be stubborn._ _I'm a father. I can deal with stubbornness._

"Actually," Dai said gravely, "the two of us are on this mission together. We're comrades now. And I protect my comrades."

He caught the glance Sakumo shot him, one of disbelief mixed with distrust, but he didn't mind it. It certainly didn't stop him from giving the wary man a big, long hug.

* * *

" _Yesterday, Hatake Sakumo aborted the S-rank mission he and his team had been assigned. He ran from battle like a coward, dragging his men with him. Now he claims he was doing it to save the lives of his subordinates, but we all know that they – that_ anyone _\- would have chosen death over this… this disgrace!"_

_Ookuni paused dramatically, giving his words a chance to sink in._

" _He's been with the Hokage since he returned. No one knows what's going to happen to him. But one thing is certain. He's finished as a shinobi. No, he's finished as a_ man _."_

* * *

Back then, Dai hadn't been able to process the information. It had gone over his head. Even now it didn't make sense. Sakumo had protected his team, but it hadn't been enough.

Dai walked along the dirt path back into the village, trying to shake the feeling of Sakumo's limp body in his embrace. He hadn't even fought Dai, just endured in silence like some kind of wooden doll.

The wind brushed through his hair, one powerful gust rustling the papers under his arm. Dai stopped in his tracks; his eyes scanned the darkness around him. Nothing. But this feeling…

He turned around, gravel crunching under his feet, and blinked.

A flash of silver and the form of a boy, black against the dark blue night sky.

It was gone before he knew whether it had been there at all.


	7. Chapter 7

"Good morning, my handsome son! I hope you've slept well because nothing's more important than starting a new day at full power!" With a huge sweeping gesture Dai led his son into the kitchen. Gai was still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. Seeing that lack of energy, Dai felt compelled to infuse his words with even more enthusiasm. "And to help provide that power, I've made you breakfast!" He pointed dramatically at the bowls sitting on the kitchen table. "Super-tasty natto!"

Shoulders slumped, Gai trotted over to his chair. "Natto? Urgh. " He picked up his chopsticks and poked at the fermented soybeans.

Who was this strange little person in his kitchen? What had happened to his son?

Could this be-? _Puberty_? The thought alone was enough to make Dai flinch. But Gai was far too young, wasn't he? Yes, yes he was! Dai nodded to himself. Gai just had a bad day. That was what this was!

Well, better to nip this in the bud! Slumped shoulders! Bad posture! Not in this household!

"Gai, sit up straight!" he yelled, his voice probably waking the neighbors. But then, it was 5 am already so what would anyone be doing in bed at this hour? "How dare you show this kind of disrespect for the breakfast your loving father made you?"

"But Dad…" Gai whined, "natto's so gross…"

"It's a source of precious energy, Gai!" Dai plopped down into his chair and picked up his chopsticks like a soldier picking up his sword. "And it's healthy!" With that he began stuffing natto into his mouth as if his life depended on it. Truth be told, he didn't even like the taste – and the slimy texture was somewhat vomit-inducing, but he'd sooner die than raise a child that didn't know to appreciate their breakfast! Picky eaters were the worst!

_I'm going to finish this and then I'm going to get seconds!_

Despite the tears building behind his eyes, Dai kept chewing and swallowing, gobbling down as much as he could. On the other side of the table Gai was picking up single soybeans with his chopsticks, squeezing his eyes shut and delicately putting them into his mouth. He pulled a face but swallowed.

The sight of his boy following his example gave Dai a warm glow of accomplishment, even as he choked and fought down the impulse to gag.

Once again he had taught his son a valuable lesson!

* * *

It wasn't until he was doing the dishes that a strange thought crossed his mind.

_I wonder what Sakumo-san is doing right now. Has he eaten breakfast with Kakashi-kun yet?_

Dai shook his head, trying to dispel the images forming in his mind – Sakumo and Kakashi at the table in that dusty, dead room, a silence thick and heavy between them, pressing down on their slumped shoulders.

He felt like grinding his teeth but managed to hold himself back. Tooth grinding was a horrible habit that would ruin one's smile!

And why was he even thinking about Sakumo-san? It was Sunday! He had the day off – and so, for that matter, did Sakumo! Plus, Gai only had two hours of light training with his team! That meant Dai would have almost a whole day he could spend with his son!

He wouldn't waste this precious time on gloomy thoughts!

* * *

Gai was in a better mood once they'd returned from their morning run, had washed off the sweat and set out to do a bit of shopping for the coming week. On the street Gai returned to his usual cheerful self, walking next to his proud papa, shoulders straight and head held high.

Dai was relieved.

They headed down Tea Road together, past the shops and stalls. Dai liked Konoha's broad main road, the colorful, familiar storefronts, the sound of gravel crunching under the feet of bustling pedestrians. Two more steps and Dai was in the spot. A few meters from where the road split, in front of the small weapon's shop, Kôshi's. How long was it now? Ten years ago? That he'd bumped into—

Dai stopped himself. Gai had gone on ahead, marching on with a resolve born from strict training regimes. Being his dad, Dai knew exactly that his son was forcing himself to keep walking, to not stop and stare with longing into Kôshi's display window where, nestled in majestic dark blue fabric, lay that pair of ironwood nunchaku. Gai wanted them more than anything, which was why Dai had been saving up for them for over a year now. It was tough to get by on a genin salary and it annoyed him that Gai had to contribute to cover their living expenses. He wanted to give his son something to make up for that, no matter how long it would take.

Fortunately, Kôshi was a personal friend who'd agreed to hold off on selling the weapon for a while until Dai had enough money. It was one more on a steadily growing list of kindnesses the old man had done Dai. As he looked at the displayed weapons, Dai couldn't help remembering that first year.

Kôshi had been there for him back then, offering to take him as an apprentice despite Dai at twenty-eight being far too old to start learning a trade. But then, he'd been too old to be a genin as well. If you didn't manage to make chuunin by the time you were twenty, you gave up and found a job. That was just the way it was. No one could raise a family on a genin's income. Not Dai, though, he'd been stubborn. He'd laughed and apologized to Kôshi, thanking him but making it clear that he would never give up on being a ninja. He just couldn't.

At the time he'd been worried Kôshi would be insulted. After all, the shopkeeper's offer had been more than generous, but Kôshi'd taken Dai's reply in stride and whenever Dai had been in a financial jam, the old man'd found some small job he could do to earn a little on the side.

And now…

He had the money, Dai realized. After less than a week he had enough to get the nunchaku for Gai. Since he'd started this mission he'd been paid every day. A B-rank salary every evening he returned the documents to the Hokage Tower.

Like a kid he'd put his hand on the display window, fingers splayed against the cool glass. He'd never had this much money before. And if he kept working for just as long as another month… Dai was stunned for a second, his mind reeling with calculations. Gai and him… In time, they might be able to afford their very own place!

"Dad! Aren't you coming?"

Gai. Dai turned around and there was his son standing in front of him, hands on his hips, bathed in glorious early morning sunlight. Happy and healthy and almost glowing from his shiny bowl cut to his neatly trimmed toenails.

Dai grinned. This was going to be a great day.

"Yup, I'm right—" he couldn't finish. Without warning, someone had gripped his shoulder from behind, was tugging lightly. Dai hadn't even felt the slightest change in the air around him. Nothing.

"Dai-san?"

"Ah!" He whipped around, a delayed reaction to the touch, the familiarity of the voice only registering when he saw the man it belonged to. Tall, blond, colors on him somehow a shade brighter than on everything else. "Minato-kun?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." Minato's smile, even the sheepish version, was like a beam of sunlight piercing through clouds. Dai's cheeks were growing warm under that sky-blue scrutiny.

"Me… startled, haha, I'm not—" His stammer petered out, going nowhere. Behind him he heard the soft gravel-crunch of Gai's footsteps. Slower than usual as if he was walking on unstable ground.

"I was hoping I'd run into you," Minato said. His voice was earnest now; his features settled into a more serious expression.

"Huh?" A friendly chat, that was what Dai had expected. Small talk before they would move on – surely Minato-kun had important things to do – but now the mood had changed all of a sudden and he was left unsure of how he was supposed to react. He smiled at the jounin, waiting for some kind of cue.

Minato looked to the right and when Dai instinctively followed his gaze, he was surprised to see the Hatake boy there, reclining against the wall of the weapon store, arms folded, looking down at his feet.

He hadn't noticed Kakashi before. The kid was like a shadow – without a tangible presence – and if Minato always seemed somehow more real than his surroundings, Kakashi was the very opposite, a faded picture stuck into a brightly colored frame. Everything else seemed to draw attention away from the pale boy.

"Kakashi, why don't you go say hello to Gai-kun?"

Kakashi didn't look up. "Because I don't want to," he drawled. He was completely unashamed of his rudeness, but the flat tone of his voice wasn't that of a brat taking pleasure in being mean either. It was simply honest in its joylessness and as such Dai couldn't even find it in him to be angry on his son's behalf. Instead he felt a pang of sorrow and pity for this boy who looked and sounded so much older than his years.

" _Kakashi."_ It was barely a repimand, but it was enough. Kakashi glanced up and nodded.

"Yes, Sensei." With that he peeled himself away from the wall, slowly, as if it took a great effort, and walked past Minato and Dai.

Dai could feel his own son hovering a few steps behind. There hadn't been a word from Gai so far. No cry of "I challenge you!", no running towards Kakashi as if the other boy was some kind of finish line in a race only Gai knew about. Nothing.

Dai thought of clenched fists and tears and despicable messages scrawled in pencil. He thought of Sakumo and his whole body tensed up as if someone had flipped an invisible switch, turning the world pitch black.

"I need to talk to you," Minato said.


	8. Chapter 8

They went into the nearby sushi place and took a seat at the counter. Dai felt out of his depth. Ever since he'd sent Gai off to the training grounds with Kakashi, a growing sense of unease had settled in the pit of his stomach. He could still see Gai's ramrod straight back as he followed Kakashi with the grim determination of a man on his way to his own execution. It was so unlike his son that the sight had given Dai the first twinges of a headache.

Next to him, Minato was stirring his tea while studying the side of Dai's face with an intensity that bordered on rudeness.

"How was your training trip with Kakashi-kun?" Dai asked just to fill the silence. The restaurant was all but deserted at this early hour; between them was only the sound of the chef's knife chopping away and the smell of raw fish.

It occurred to Dai that he really didn't want to eat sushi for lunch.

He took a sip of tea and met Minato's gaze over the rim of his cup.

"Good. Kakashi picks up on new techniques so fast. It's almost scary." Resting his elbow on the polished counter, Minato continued to look straight into Dai's eyes. Dai forced a smile.

"Haha, they sure don't call him a genius for nothing!" For a moment he almost expected his voice to echo in the large room, he'd been too loud, his voice booming, expanding like a hot air balloon against his will. He always did this when he was off-balance. Though why he was off-balance, he couldn't have said.

"Yes, but I'm glad that he's got a friend like Gai-kun to train with. It's important for him to spend time with kids his age. Maybe now more than ever." Minato paused, lowering his eyes for the first time. "That's actually why I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh?" He should have seen this coming, Dai thought. Gai had probably said something before Minato left with Kakashi. Perhaps there had been a scene. Gai might have declared himself no longer Kakashi's rival in front of all their friends! For all Dai knew his son had made poor little Kakashi cry!

He nodded sternly. As a father, he had to take responsibility for that kind of behavior.

"When we came back yesterday evening, I brought Kakashi home and I ran into Sakumo-senpai." Minato sighed. "He looked awful. Much worse than I expected."

Two blinks later Dai's brain still hadn't really caught up. _Sakumo-san?_ He shrugged awkwardly, setting down his cup. "It's been a challenging few days." That seemed a too depressing note to end on, so he added, "But he's prevailing!"

"I'm glad to hear that." Despite what he said, Minato didn't look the least bit glad. He reached out, his fingertips brushing the green ceramic of his cup. "I'm worried about him." He withdrew his hand again and pulled a face. "To tell you the truth, I took Kakashi with me on that trip because I wanted to shield him from what was happening in the village." Again he sighed, his hand now massaging the top of his thigh, which made Dai wonder if Minato was in pain. "But later I kept asking myself whether I'd made a mistake, whether it would have been better for Sakumo-senpai to have his son by his side. Still, as his sensei my priority has to be Kakashi." He brightened a little and his eyes found Dai's face again. "When Hiruzen-sama told me that you were helping Senpai, I was relieved. I want to thank you for that."

To Dai that was more than a little baffling. He laughed out loud. "There's no need to thank me! The Hokage gave me a mission; I'm happy to fulfill it!"

"Actually, I was hoping it wasn't _just_ a mission."

"Huh?"

This time Minato did pick up his cup. "I'm sorry, Dai-san. I wanted to ask you for a favor - it's a pretty selfish request." He put it down again; it clinked softly against the wooden counter. "With everything that's going on right now, I won't be able to be in Konoha for the next few weeks; I would have asked Kushina, but she's a jounin too and we're all busy with missions right now." Dai frowned. He was, slowly but surely, beginning to remember how busy the village had been during the last few days. Shinobi constantly coming and going, small crowds at the village gate at all times of day.

Minato shook his head sadly. For a moment there he looked like a kid again – and how scary was it that Dai could still picture that little blond boy perfectly? He wasn't _that_ much older than Minato!

"I'm leaving tomorrow and I won't be able to take Kakashi with me this time, so I wanted to ask you," Minato said. "Can you keep an eye on them for me? Sakumo-senpai and Kakashi?"

_Chop –_ the sound of the knife coming down punctuated Minato's question. Dai's ears rang with it. This he hadn't expected although, in hindsight, was it really this much of a surprise?

"What do you mean, keep an eye on them?" he asked. He'd understood, of course. He was supposed to babysit until Minato would return. The request seemed unfair to him – and in a way, wasn't it an insult to Sakumo-san?

"Make sure they're okay. I know it's a lot to ask. You haven't known Sakumo-senpai as long as I have. And I'm Kakashi's teacher, I should—" Minato frowned, closing his eyes a second too long for a blink. When he continued his voice sounded strained. "But something's brewing in Suna…" He shook his head again, only this time Dai couldn't conjure up the image of that little boy anymore. "Anyway, you're a good man, Dai-san, I trust you."

Dai nodded. He didn't know why he nodded since that last part hadn't been a question. Not really. Minato spoke as if Dai had already agreed, as if refusal was an option that had never even entered his mind. Well, Dai would agree, of course he would, but still…

It was like there was a bad smell in the air now. What Minato asked, it implied that he didn't think Sakumo-san capable of looking after his own child. For some reason, Dai felt almost offended on behalf of the other man now – and that despite the fact that he himself had had similar concerns before. But Dai was a father and Minato wasn't, so he just plain didn't understand that you wouldn't let any harm come to your kid, not as long as there was the tiniest spark of life in you.

But as uncomfortable as he was with the situation, Dai realized that more than anything he did want to help Sakumo-san.

"You can count on me!" Dai said, forcing his widest grin.

* * *

After their serious talk, Minato had stayed for another half-hour and they'd chatted amicably about this and that. Mostly Gai, Dai had to admit. Whenever the topic of his son came up, he just couldn't stop himself.

Then Kakashi had come back, announced that Gai had already met up with his team at the training grounds and sulked until Minato took him for another round of training, leaving Dai sitting at the counter by himself, being stared down by a disgruntled sushi chef who was sick of selling nothing but tea.

* * *

It was too late now to go and get his son for some time together, Dai realized; he'd have to wait till Gai was done with training and knowing Gai, that wouldn't be until nightfall.

Dai wasn't one to be bitter about things he couldn't change, though. He straightened his shoulders, thanked the sushi chef profusely, tipped generously and left the restaurant to head into the forest for some extra training and meditation.

* * *

It was getting dark by the time Dai stepped out of the long shadows of the trees and set out on the dirt path to the training fields by the lake.

He made it halfway, passing other fields, either deserted or still occupied by people who were in the middle of packing up, when, suddenly, he spotted a small figure on the horizon, a familiar dark outline against the soft lavender and orange sky.

Dai ran the last few meters towards his son. His arms were itching to wrap around the kid and he opened them, anticipating the embrace. Except that Gai didn't see him. He was running with his head down, his upper body bent, legs pumping. As focused as he was, Gai didn't notice his father and Dai let his arms sink to his sides when the boy jogged past him.

"Gai!" he called, shocked but not surprised by what he'd seen on his sons face, in the way he carried himself. Gai's left eye had been a dark stain, purple, swollen to a slit. The boy stopped and spun around.

"Papa!" He waved as if he had been the first to spot Dai. "I lost against Kakashi, so I have to do five hundred laps around the training grounds! That's the rule I made!" His voice sounded so cheerful that Dai momentarily forgot about the black eye, the split lip, and all the other injuries that were covered by trusty green spandex. Dai smiled back, a wide, bright smile and jogged over to his son.

"Five hundred, eh?" Dai scratched his beard. "It's pretty late, though," he pointed out.

"I made the rule, Dad! So I gotta follow it, that's the man I am!" Hands on his hips and everything. Dai could barely keep himself from hugging Gai then and there.

"Of course!" He smiled, mirroring his son's pose. "But you know what? I'm here, so I can take half your rule!"

"What do you mean take my rule?"

" _Half_ your rule. If you've got a comrade with you and he wants to help you out – or if you see a friend struggling to fulfill his word – it's possible to take half of someone's rule!"

"Really? Since when?" Gai was too adorable when he frowned like that, head cocked like a curious puppy.

"Always! So let's do it! We both run 250 laps! Okay?" Dai had to reach out and ruffled Gai's hair at that point; he just couldn't help it.

"Hmmm…okay." The reply was somewhat reluctant, still tinged with doubt, but as soon as Dai started running, Gai hurried to catch up and soon enough they were running side by side towards the setting sun.

* * *

"I can walk, Dad," Gai mumbled into his ear. Loud and clear, Dai could hear the yawn he was suppressing, right there in his voice.

He smiled more to himself than anyone else since Gai, draped over his back, his chin on Dai's shoulder, couldn't see. Maybe the stars could, he thought, looking up at the tiny white flecks of light above.

"I know, but as long as I'm here, you don't have to," he told his son, still smiling his secret smile, "as long as I can carry you, I will."


	9. Chapter 9

There was no better time of day than early morning, at least in Dai's book there wasn't. Each and every day he got up at dawn, went for a run, then darted into the communal showers in their apartment building and after that got right to preparing breakfast for Gai.

Only today it wasn't just breakfast, it was also a bentô for later. He'd let Gai sleep in and then send him on his way to his mission, a C-rank that required a long hike to a small mountain village to the east. Gai would be gone with his team for three days.

Thinking about his son's trip made Dai's heart feel heavy. Although Gai had been on a few longer missions already, Dai wasn't quite used to his absence yet. The only way to get over it was to keep himself busy with training, housework and missions.

Missions… As soon as the word entered his thoughts, memories of the previous day cropped up like insidious weeds. Dai replayed his conversation with Minato in his head and sighed a deep, troubled sigh.

_Sakumo-san…_

It was Monday. In less than an hour he would be on his way to the Hatake residence where Sakumo-san was waiting. Frustrated, Dai rested his forehead against the cool wood of his hanging kitchen cabinet.

Just thinking about Sakumo depressed him. Even a naturally optimistic and happy person like him was not immune to that kind of level of sadness.

No, he couldn't give in! Sakumo needed him to be strong!

Besides, he'd given Minato his word.

With newfound determination, Dai began chopping vegetables for his bentô.

* * *

After he had said goodbye to Gai at the village gate – and shed a manly tear or two – Dai made his way to the Hokage Tower to get the paperwork for Sakumo. Then he squared his shoulders and walked to the Hatake house.

* * *

He was thinking about Gai's black eye when he knocked on the door. It had looked a lot better in the morning – the salve Dai had put on it the night before had helped a great deal, but the bruise hadn't faded completely. Young Hatake Kakashi didn't pull his punches.

Dai slipped the bundle of paperwork under his arm and transferred the two bentô he'd brought on a brilliant whim to his left hand. With his right he knocked once more, harder this time. Then he waited for the by now almost familiar sound of Sakumo's heavy footsteps.

It never came.

Instead the door was pulled open noiselessly and Dai found himself looking at an empty hallway. He lowered his gaze. Kakashi stared up at him, his eyes narrowed in annoyance and suspicion. "What?" he asked, his voice completely flat.

"Kakashi-kun!" Dai forced a grin and edged closer to the threshold. Kakashi stood with one hand on the door and the other planted on the door frame, effectively blocking the way into the house. "Is your father home?"

"Why?"

Could this kid only speak in monosyllabic grunts? Dai had heard many a parent complain about sulky teenagers, but Kakashi wasn't even a teen yet. He was younger than Gai! He should have been a bright-eyed, idealistic, adorable kid! Not this silver-haired old man trapped in a small body.

"I have these important documents for him. Delivering them to your father is my mission, so please let him know that I'm here!" Dai whipped the paperwork out from under his arm and held it up dramatically. In a perfect world the clouds would have opened to let a single ray of golden light stream down on the bundle of files, but no matter how much Dai willed it to happen, it didn't work.

"How is something like that supposed to be a real mission?" Kakashi had the most piercing grey eyes, Dai noticed. Clearly he was already used to staring down people who were much older than him, to make them follow his orders and answer his questions.

Dai, however, had no idea what to tell the kid. After all, didn't he have doubts himself? Not to mention his talk with Minato… It was becoming more and more obvious that his "mission" was nothing more than a front.

Ignoring the awkward break in their conversation, Kakashi nodded as if he had received a satisfactory reply.

"Ah, that's right… You're a genin," he said.

This was more familiar territory. Dai beamed. "Yes, I am!" He liked the way his voice rang out, proud and true.

There was a split second of movement on the boy's face. His eyebrows twitched, but when he spoke his tone remained as flat as before.

"Why are you smiling? Aren't you embarrassed?"

"Why would I be?" Dai's smile never faltered. "I'm a hard-working Konoha shinobi! As long as I give it my all every day, I can look at my handsome reflection with a proud smile!" It was a perfect moment for a thumbs-up, so he didn't let it go to waste.

"I'm eight years old and I'm a chûnin," Kakashi drawled. The way he shifted, his shoulders slumping into a vague shrug - that body language suggested boredom, but his eyes were firmly on Dai. "Although you're an old man and I'm a still a boy, I outrank you. That's embarrassing."

Hearing that blunt statement, Dai's heart instantly softened for Kakashi. Despite that dig about him being old – hah! As if! - he felt a warmth for the boy that made him want to wrap his arms around him. No kid should see the world through such a sharp lens of constant competition!

"No, it's not. I don't mind being a genin and I'm always honored to meet young men such as yourself who are bursting with youth and talent!" Praise, honest, heartfelt praise like this never failed to make Gai's cheeks turn pink with pleasure.

Kakashi shook his head.

"Even if you say you're not embarrassed, if everyone else thinks you should be and is embarrassed for you, that means it _is_ embarrassing, no matter what you tell yourself," he said in the serious manner of a court official passing judgment. "It's a fact."

"Is that so? But I'm not embarrassed. I'm proud of myself!"

Kakashi frowned. "Then you're an idiot."

It took some guts to say that to an adult! Dai was momentarily stunned, then broke out into laughter. He couldn't help it. He liked this kid who wasn't afraid to speak his mind. "I guess I must be!"

That got Kakashi to blink and take a small step back. He was still watching Dai, taking measure with his eyes. There was a wariness about him. He had the instinctive suspicion of a stray dog. Dai's unpredictable reaction, though, seemed to have shaken something loose. After a beat, Kakashi turned, leaning against the doorframe.

"… My father's taking a bath. He'll be out in a bit. You can wait in the hallway." Nothing about Kakashi's tone was welcoming, but he'd made just enough room for Dai to squeeze past into the house.

Dai took those few steps. They felt huge, somehow. And when he was right next to Kakashi, he had a brilliant idea.

He reached out to ruffle Kakashi's hair – a tender, fatherly gesture! – and said, "It's not that important, you know? What other people say or think. What's in _your_ _heart_ is what matters." He'd wanted to take a moment to let this piece of wisdom sink it, but Kakashi snorted and turned his head away, his spiky hair tickling Dai's palm.

"Tell my dad I went out," he said and with that he was out the door, leaving Dai in the dim hallway of this strange, silent house.


	10. Chapter 10

Dai spent an exciting five minutes staring at the grey wall. It was a good wall, he decided, clean and sturdy. Just not a very interesting one. He listened as he waited, keeping an ear out for any sound from upstairs. Splashing water, footsteps, _something._ There was nothing.

The ongoing silence made him chew on his lip, made him shift his weight from one foot to the other. He wasn't good at standing still for long amounts of time. Awkwardness and piercing stares aside, he wished Kakashi hadn't just run off like that. It was too weird, being in a stranger's house on his own. Plus, wasn't it irresponsible to let a random strange man into the house only to leave him unobserved? Shouldn't Kakashi know better?

_Unless he really doesn't see me as a threat…_

A depressing thought. Dai cringed - not that he was a threat! But he was still a shinobi…

He leaned against the wall behind him – it too was grey and smugly nondescript – and sighed. This wasn't the start to his day he'd envisioned. By this time he'd planned to have lured Sakumo out of his shell with the extra bentô he'd made for him. They would have had breakfast together while a meaningful conversation about fatherhood and duty would have bloomed naturally between them! In the end there would have been a long, manly hug during which Sakumo might have broken down and shed a few tears, crying out his frustration and pain. It would have been a moment of healing!

Dai sighed once more. He knew he was being unreasonable. He'd let Minato-kun's words go to his head. A simple bentô wouldn't be enough to help Sakumo. No matter how much he wanted it to be.

He closed his eyes, trying to envision a smile on that pale face. Or maybe not a smile… A look of relief would be enough for now. Anything a little less pained than what Dai had seen so far.

"Kakashi? Have you—"

How had he not heard footsteps? Startled, Dai jerked into a more upright position just as Sakumo appeared at the top of the stairs. He was shirtless and damp, a towel hanging loosely around his neck. Dai stared at his almost hairless, sparsely muscled chest. It wasn't at all what he'd expected from a legendary jônin. Standing there in his sweatpants, Sakumo looked boyish despite his age and oddly vulnerable.

"Dai?" Sakumo was frowning down at him. He took the last few steps carefully, as if unsure of his footing. "Did Kakashi let you in? Where is he?"

"Ah, well… He told me to tell you…"

_What exactly?_ _Not much…_

A father would want to know where his son went, but Kakashi hadn't disclosed that information to Dai. He'd simply left and now Dai felt like a failure for not asking. Not that Kakashi would have told him anyway, but still…

"He went out," Dai said. A different person might have shrugged, but Dai kept very still and looked Sakumo straight in the eye.

"Oh… I see."

It wasn't even a reaction.

Sakumo was going to go about his day now. He would accept Kakashi's absence like Dai suspected he accepted his son's presence as something not worth acknowledging.

Holding out his hand, Sakumo stepped closer to Dai, close enough for Dai to smell the faint scent of soap still clinging to Sakumo's skin.

"The documents?"

It took Dai a second to realize what he wanted. The paperwork. Right. Sakumo would take it and withdraw into a dark room by himself. Dai was expected to hand them over and leave.

"Actually," he said, tightening his grip on the bundle of files, "I thought we could have breakfast first."

Sakumo's frown deepened. "Breakfast?" He spoke the word as if he had never heard it before, as if he had no idea what it could mean.

"Yeah!" Being enthusiastic, Dai had found throughout his life, could alleviate doubt – in himself as well as in others. Never slow down! He held up the two bentô he'd brought, dangling them in front of Sakumo's face like one would dangle a carrot in front of a donkey. "I accidentally made too many today… Gai went on a mission, you know, and I had all those ingredients in the house. I went a little overboard! Haha!"

"Accidentally…?" Sakumo shook his head. For a moment there it looked like he was going to comment, but then nothing came. He was still holding out his hand and frowning. It was clear where this was going.

"Thank you for the kind offer, but I've already eaten." As expected Sakumo's reply was stiff and formal. Like a cold marble statue he stood in the hallway, his dark eyes avoiding Dai's face. His hand reaching for the paperwork.

It happened the very moment Sakumo's fingertips brushed the files. As if a switch had been flipped, as if the action itself had been a silent signal, Sakumo's stomach growled. The sound was so loud and unexpected that Dai nearly burst into laughter. Sakumo's reaction didn't help. He stood frozen in place, his face turning a shockingly deep crimson.

"That— I…"

"You _are_ hungry!" Dai couldn't have hoped for anything better. He was close to breaking into cheers. "Then it's decided! We're going to have breakfast!"

"No! I must be digesting—" Sakumo folded his arms across his chest, but his pink cheeks ruined his stern look. The blush, the long silver hair falling onto his pale shoulders… It was… cute on him, Dai decided. Then he felt silly for having thought of another man – a superior shinobi! – as cute of all things.

He squared his shoulders, pushing away his weird thoughts. "You can't fool me, Sakumo-san! You might think it's beneath you as a jônin to eat with an eternal genin like me, but I won't leave you to starve yourself!" With that Dai closed the distance between them and grabbed Sakumo by one wrist.

"What are you—?"

Legendary jônin or not -dragging Sakumo over into the next room and making him sit down at the table was surprisingly easy.

* * *

"I don't know why you are doing this. None of this is any of your business."

Sakumo topless in a chair in the kitchen was no more enthusiastic than half naked Sakumo in the hallway had been.

_Fine._

Dai put one bentô box in front of his reluctant host and went rummaging through the drawers for chopsticks. When he'd found them, he sat down opposite Sakumo, who was busy staring at the tabletop, his hands balled to fists in his lap.

"You can't work if you don't eat properly," Dai said. He opened his box, hoping the delicious smell emanating from it would whet Sakumo's appetite.

No such luck.

Sakumo continued staring. He made no move to pick up the chopsticks Dai had placed next to his bentô.

When he spoke, he didn't look up. His voice was a toneless mumble easily lost in the big, bright kitchen. "I don't feel like eating."

Dai swallowed. The naked honesty of the statement had caught him off guard. He didn't know what to say to that. He put his chopsticks down and asked, "Why?"

"Why?" Sakumo made a strange dry sound. Dai thought it might have been a cough until he spoke again. "You're a funny man." A chuckle then. But with no life in it and certainly no humor.

_Why won't you look at me?_ Dai stared hard at the slumped form in the chair opposite him. He didn't know what to do, but he also didn't understand.

_How can you just give up like this?_

Helplessness quickly turned into frustration, which, just as swiftly, transformed into anger. Dai couldn't contain himself any longer. He felt like slamming his fist down on the table hard enough to break it.

"Hating yourself accomplishes nothing," he said instead. "Sitting here, starving yourself, none of this helps."

Another dead chuckle. Sakumo's eyes darted up at him. They were dull and hopeless. The look in them was ancient and made a shiver run up Dai's spine. "What would you do if you were in my position, Maito Dai-san?"

"I would keep moving! Don't dwell on the past!" It was easy enough to repeat stock phrases like that. Dai nodded and jumped to his feet. He planted his hands on the table and looked Sakumo in the eye. "You can't change what's done, so you have to look to the future!"

"And how does one do that?"

"Well… for starters… you could eat something!"

Grinning, Dai gestured towards the bentô. "You'll love this! It's a special recipe!"

Sakumo sighed and picked up the chopsticks. He didn't look convinced, but he did reach for the bentô box and that gave Dai hope. He sat down again and picked up his own set of chopsticks, ready to dig in. "There's nothing more energizing, more delicious than—"

Dai stopped. Sakumo had taken the lid off his boxed lunch and was staring at it with the strangest expression on his face. For a second his eyes had gone almost comically wide, then they'd narrowed under a heavy frown. When he looked up at Dai, his face was as hard and unreadable as an Anbu mask.

"What is this?" Sakumo asked, his voice dripping suspicion.

"Huh?"

Without another word, Sakumo pushed his boxed lunch and its lid over to Dai.

"Is this supposed to be some kind of joke?"

Dai looked into the box. On top of the rice a message was laid out in thin strips of carrot.

頑張って！！

He swallowed, feeling heat rise to his face.

_Oh no…_

Reluctantly, he glanced at the lid.

_Argh…_

A green post it-note was taped inside and written on it were, in his own elegant handwriting, the beautiful, heartfelt words, _Papa loves you very much!_

"Papa?" Dai could have sworn there was sarcasm in Sakumo's voice, but he had bigger concerns than the other man now.

"It's Gai's! It's Gai's bentô! He was supposed to take this one on his mission! I must have mixed them up!" Dai jumped up and pulled on his hair in frustration. He wanted to pace the length of the kitchen – no, he wanted to run out of the house and out of the village, up that mountain path to his son! "Now he'll just have a regular lunch without his father's loving words of encouragement!"

"I think your son will live…"

"You don't understand! I'm the only one—"

"He has?" Sakumo raised an eyebrow. He was an infuriating person. "Are you?"

No, of course not. Gai had a teacher he respected, he had friends, team mates and a rival, but that didn't mean—

"I'm his father," Dai said. He hoped his tone conveyed that this particular part of their discussion was over. He sat back down again, unwilling to acknowledge what had happened. "Let's eat."

* * *

Dai should have been proud of himself for getting Sakumo to open up – even if it had been only the tiniest bit – but instead he spent the rest of the day repressing mental images of the disappointment on Gai's face when he would open his lunchbox and see that his dad hadn't made him anything special.

Dai trained. He did the laundry and mended a couple of his and Gai's torn jumpsuits. He cleaned and did the grocery shopping, but nothing really helped.

When evening came he dutifully made his way back to Sakumo's home to retrieve the finished paperwork.

Once again, Kakashi was at the door, greeting him with a bored nod. "Dad went to bed early. He told me to give this to you." Kakashi held out the bundle of files.

Dai took it and was about to say his goodbyes – if he'd learned anything so far it was that neither Hatake was especially fond of small talk – but Kakashi inclined his head, giving him a long, pensive look that reminded Dai of the time he'd been sent to the hospital by a teacher who'd been convinced there had to be a medical reason for Dai's inability to mold chakra.

"Is something wrong?" Dai asked after the stare had lasted for a couple of unnerving seconds.

"Not really." With nothing more than a shrug, Kakashi stepped back, closing the door in Dai's face before he had the chance to protest. Dai shook his head and sighed. The boy was impossible to talk to.

_He must get it from his father…_

Having little in terms of other options, Dai walked down the path through the garden back to the front gate, where he turned around once more to glance at the house. He didn't know why. He'd just had that feeling…

The lights were on downstairs, but the windows on the second floor were all dark. Except…

Dai blinked. For a second there he'd thought there'd been movement in one of the black rectangles. A curtain stirring?

_Must have been my imagination._ Dai shook his head as he closed the screeching gate behind himself. _What a weird family…_


	11. Chapter 11

For the next few days Dai kept bringing food to Sakumo's house. Needless to say, he'd come up with some kind of apology every time - "Oh, I bought too many groceries!", "It's just that I really wanted to try this new recipe!", "I completely forgot that Gai is on a mission…", "It's embarrassing to admit, but during full moon I sometimes cook in my sleep!", "Anyway, it'd be a shame to let this go to waste, wouldn't it?" – and every time Sakumo would give him a funny look but accept whatever Dai had made.

He'd do it reluctantly, of course, but Dai figured that Sakumo was simply too tired to fight back and like Dai himself, like most shinobi who'd lived through a war, he couldn't bring himself to throw away food. So he ate.

Dai usually hung around for that part, congratulating himself and wondering why something as trivial as watching Sakumo eat made him feel happy.

Well, he was keeping his promise to Minato, so that was probably part of it.

Yes, he was fulfilling his mission, _every_ aspect of it! And who wouldn't be happy knowing they were acing their mission?

For three days Dai felt fine, but then the fourth day rolled around and with it the date Gai was scheduled to return from his mission passed without any sign of his team.

* * *

After a night of less than two hours of sleep, Dai woke up worried. He got up, he got dressed, all the while listening for the sound of Gai's feet on the stairs, for the scratch of his key being inserted into the lock on their front door. But on this morning the apartment building was as silent as a grave.

Dai walked to the living-room window and stared out onto the street. A flash of green at the edge of his field of vision made him whip around, but it was some other kid, blond and shorter than Gai and insignificant.

_They're less than ten hours late,_ he told himself, _it doesn't mean anything._

His stomach hurt nonetheless.

* * *

Sakumo chewed like an old man. It was an uncharitable thought, but as Dai watched the other man sitting hunched over his lunchbox, his jaw working slowly, he had a hard time keeping his annoyance at bay. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to be with his son. As for Sakumo… What reason did he have to act so miserable when Kakashi was right outside in the garden? If Sakumo wanted to see his son, all he had to do was turn his head and look out the window!

While Dai…

"Argh!" With a groan he sank into a chair, only to jump up a second later.

Sakumo stopped eating and looked at him, his hooded eyes peering out from under his bangs.

Dai squeezed his own eyes shut. When he opened them again, Sakumo had resumed eating. His movements looked mechanical to Dai. Devoid of human emotion.

_Why am I still here,_ he asked himself. _He doesn't want me here. I should go home. Maybe Gai's already waiting there._

But what if he wasn't? It was true, Dai wanted to drop everything and run home, but he wanted Gai to be there when he got back. The longer he stayed, the likelier it was that Gai would be waiting for him at home by the time he returned, wasn't it? Deep down, he knew that his logic was faulty, but he couldn't bear the thought of entering an empty apartment. He just couldn't. He sat down again.

There was another option, though!

_I should go up there! If I put my mind to it, I can make it to that village in a day!_

Dai pushed his chair back, ready to get up and leave. Then he stopped, a different thought crossing his mind.

… _Gai isn't a baby anymore and I can't go running after him every time he's late. It's still morning. It's been less than a day—_

He hated this. It was true - Gai's team wasn't _that_ late - but not doing anything went against every one of his natural instincts.

_I need to be strong and trust in my son's skills! I have to wait until he comes back!_

Dai groaned. He felt like weeping.

"Is everything…" Sakumo's voice, faint though it was, jerked Dai out of his thoughts and back to reality. Sakumo was looking at him, his hand poised in midair, holding a piece of cooked chicken in his chopsticks. When their gazes met, Sakumo averted his eyes.

"… are you alright?" He'd rephrased the question, made it more personal. Under different circumstances Dai would have been impressed and pleased. He would have considered this a breakthrough, but now he couldn't find it in himself to care all that much.

"No!" he yelled. "I'm not! Everything is terrible!"

That shut Sakumo up. He blinked, then slowly put the piece of chicken into his mouth before setting the chopsticks down on the table.

Dai watched him chew the chicken like an old man.

_Is he going to ask?_

It didn't look like it. But then Sakumo was chewing so slowly…

Maybe he was shocked that Dai had said no. Usually people said yes, no matter how they really felt. It was always _yes, everything is fine_. That was the world Sakumo lived in. The world of pretension.

Well, Dai didn't live in that world. And he wasn't going to start pretending.

"It's Gai," he said, just to break the silence. "His team was supposed to be back from their mission by now, but they're not."

"I see. When were they expected to arrive?"

"Last night."

"Then it's been about twelve hours?"

"Yes!"

"What was the mission?" Some part of Dai couldn't quite believe he was having this conversation with Sakumo, that Sakumo was actually showing an interest! But here he was, eyes alert for once and waiting for a reply to his question.

_He's a father too. He must have been through this with Kakashi, so he understands…_

"A C-rank delivery to Nakagi village."

Sakumo nodded. "Well, the weather up there can be fickle. They probably spent an extra night somewhere to avoid getting caught in a storm."

Dai had the same hope. The scenario was plausible and the calm and collected manner in which Sakumo laid it out to him helped easing his mind a little.

"Your son's teacher is Hyûga Yakuchi, right?" Sakumo didn't wait for confirmation."She is one of the best kunoichi I know and she tends to be very cautious. If she senses danger, she will wait it out."

Yakuchi-sensei was a little older than the two of them – a little old for a jônin sensei, to be honest, not that Dai would ever dare to say that to her face – and only now did it occur to him that Sakumo and her might have fought side by side during the war, that they might actually be friends.

"You don't have to worry. I'm sure your son will be fine."

It was kindness and Dai hadn't expected it. Not from the man sitting opposite him, still slumped in his chair but more awake than usual. In the last few minutes, Dai realized, Sakumo had said more to him than in the entire time they'd been forced to work together on this "mission".

"You're right. I'm being silly…" His gut was still telling him that something was very wrong, that he should be running up that mountain trail, but he couldn't let this moment go unacknowledged. "Thank you," Dai said.

Sakumo dipped his head and averted his eyes.

* * *

When Dai got home, there was no sign of Gai.

So Dai decided that he had waited long enough. Sure, the rule was that no backup was sent out before a squad was at least forty-eight hours late or had sent a request, but Dai was a father! A worried father!

What Sakumo had said about Yakuchi-sensei was one hundred percent true, however, he'd neglected to mention that she was also a stickler for punctuality. So far her team held the genin record for always finishing their missions on time, if not early. Yakuchi was a no-nonsense kind of woman. She allowed no dawdling, no playing around whatsoever.

It would have taken a hell of a storm to stop her and the sky over Konoha was an endless blue, an almost cloudless picture book-sky.

No, he really couldn't wait any longer!

Dai didn't pack. He wouldn't need anything because he would be in Nakagi within the next six hours. He would not take a break, he would not slow down, he'd find his son, he'd make sure Gai was alright and he'd take him home!

* * *

Dai got as far as the village gate where he stopped dead in his tracks.

"Team five reporting back. One injured – we're heading to the hospital."

That voice! Yakuchi-san!

_One injured…_

His heart hammering, Dai pushed his way through the throng of pedestrians until – finally! – he could see the small group standing in front of the guard post. He picked out the green jumpsuit immediately.

"Gai!"

Gai turned around. He was okay! A little dirty maybe, his hair disheveled, but otherwise he looked just fine.

"Dad—" Before Gai could finish whatever he wanted to say, Dai had his arms around him and held him tight.

"You're okay!" Gently, he pushed Gai away to study him with an arm's length of distance between them. "You are okay, right? You're not hurt-"

"Maito-san." He looked up from where he was kneeling on the ground, his hands clasping Gai's narrow shoulders. Yakuchi had stepped closer and was towering over him now. There was always a glower on her face, this one, though, looked darker than usual. "I apologize for the delay. If you want to, you can take your son home now. Ebisu, you can go too. I'm going to the hospital with Genma."

Genma, who was barely hanging onto her back, grimaced at his teacher's words. His face was paler than the clouds above. Dai hoped the kid wasn't losing blood, but Yakuchi would have checked and she wouldn't still be standing in front of him if the boy's life was in danger.

He hoped.

"Don't we have to go to the mission desk?" Ebisu asked.

"I'll do that tomorrow. You're dismissed."

"Understood!" Ebisu saluted but made no move to leave. Dai could tell that, behind those dark sunglasses, the kid's eyes were glued to his hurt comrade.

Patting Gai on the shoulder, Dai straightened.

"Do you need help?" he asked the teacher. Genma's eyes had slid shut. His breathing looked slow and regular to Dai. It didn't seem like he was in too much pain.

"He'll be fine. His injuries aren't serious. But you could do me a favor…"

"Of course!" Dai nodded eagerly.

"Go to Shiranui-san's house and tell her that her son is at the hospital."

"Right!"

* * *

On their way to Genma's house, Dai wracked his brain for a good way to tell Samayako the news. He wanted to soften the blow as much as possible. As Genma's mother, she would surely be shocked to hear that he'd been hurt. For all he knew, she was already out of her mind with worry!

But then, hearing that her son was back in the village, alive, would be an incredible relief too. In fact, the news might make her so happy, she might even embrace him! Dai shook his head. No, this was the wrong thing to think! It was reprehensible! Poor young Genma was at the hospital! Injured! In pain! Dai couldn't go around wondering what kind of benefits he might reap from the situation!

Feeling guilty, Dai looked at his own son who was walking beside him, uncharacteristically quiet. Gai was staring straight ahead, an unreadable expression on his face. He didn't even seem to notice that his father was watching him.

With Genma injured and Yakuchi-san in a hurry to get to the hospital, Dai realized suddenly, he'd never even got an explanation.

"What happened? How did Genma get hurt?" he asked now.

Gai glanced at him, his brow creasing. His hands were balled into fists. The bandages he usually wore for support and protection were gone, Dai noticed, leaving torn sleeves and mud-splattered skin.

"We were attacked by three missing nin from Kusagakure," Ebisu piped up next to him. Since his family lived near Genma and his mother, he had tagged along. As usual Dai had completely forgotten about the kid's presence until he spoke. "Sensei fought them. We were supposed to run ahead to complete the mission, but Genma and Gai didn't listen."

"Yakuchi-sensei was in trouble…" Gai mumbled.

"Well, Genma almost got himself killed. That one guy threw him off a cliff. Thankfully, there were lots of trees and bushes down there to break his fall."

"You fought three missing nin?" His son was alive, walking right by his side; Dai had to remind himself of that fact as nausea twisted his stomach into knots. He didn't want to imagine what could have happened.

_They're strong. They're not little kids. They managed. I should be proud._

_I_ am _proud,_ he told himself firmly.

Gai was staring at his feet as if he was afraid the ground might drop away beneath them if he so much as glanced away. He didn't meet his father's concerned gaze.

"Sensei did most of the fighting. She killed two, but Gai killed the last one!" Dai had to force himself to not stop dead at Ebisu's last sentence. The kid looked perfectly pleased. "It was quite impressive."

"Gai..." _Are you okay?_ Dai swallowed the question. He knew his son wouldn't give him an honest answer, not in front of his teammate. But this had been the first time he'd killed someone, hadn't it? Dai couldn't quite wrap his mind around the concept of his little boy killing someone. And Gai didn't look okay at all.

"He was going to stab sensei. I just…"

"Of course it was a team effort in the end," Ebisu declared.

Dai couldn't think of anything to say to that. He was regretting the promise he'd given Yakuchi. He wanted to take Gai home to their tiny apartment and put band aids on his cuts and scratches and cook him dinner and tuck him into bed.

They walked the rest of the way in silence. Even after Ebisu had gone Gai avoided Dai's eyes and didn't say anything.

By the time they got to Samayako's house Dai felt like the silence between them was a living, festering thing.

Because he had to, he knocked on the door.

* * *

Stepping over the threshold into his apartment made Dai feel like at least some of the weight on his shoulders had been removed. Finally, he was alone with Gai.

Even his short exchange with Samayako had seemed never-ending. Out of politeness he'd offered to accompany her to the hospital, but to his relief she'd declined. She was fine, she'd said and Dai believed her. There'd been no hug; she hadn't shown much emotion at all. She'd nodded at him, mechanically. The things she'd said to him were small, contained.

_Oh._

_I see._

_Thank you._

She was Anbu and a jônin and she acted like one.

Dai on the other hand… He was still worried. Watching Gai walk around in a daze didn't help.

"Are you okay?" he asked, following Gai into his room.

"Sure." Gai glanced at him over his shoulder. When Dai made no move to leave, he turned around. "What is it, Dad?"

"Nothing." Nervous for some reason, Dai scratched the back of his head. "I just… thought you might want to talk to your loving father."

"About what?"

"What happened."

"What's there to talk about? We completed our mission. I protected my friends like you said." Gai folded his arms across his chest. His stance was all defiance.

"I know! I'm proud of you! But—"

"What? I defeated that guy. It was nothing." Gai turned away again. Under his thin spandex suit Dai could see the tension in his shoulders. "He wasn't that strong."

What was he supposed to say to that? His son's words made him incredibly sad, but he didn't think telling Gai that would be any help. It would only make matters worse. On some level, Gai was right. He had done nothing wrong, in fact, he had done exactly what he was supposed to do! And yet—

"Okay," Dai said, nodding for emphasis. He would push away his doubts and act like a shinobi! "I'll be in the kitchen, making dinner! Your favorite curry, extra spicy! If you need anything else, just tell me!"

"Yeah…" Gai's voice drifted after him like a lost spirit.

* * *

At dinner, Gai barely ate. He dipped his spoon into his curry, fishing around in it in a strange absent-minded manner for a while before declaring that he wasn't hungry.

"I'll go for a run!" he called from the hallway when Dai was doing the dishes in the kitchen.

"Wait," Dai called back, doubling his dish-washing speed, "I'll come with you!"

Instead of a reply there was only the sound of the door falling shut.

* * *

When Dai went to retrieve the paperwork in the evening, Sakumo was waiting for him.

The door was pulled open before he could knock and there was Sakumo, a serious expression on his face.

"Your son?" were the first words out of his mouth. They warmed Dai's heart, making him smile. For a second he allowed himself to push his concern away and remembered that first glow of relief he'd felt.

"He's back! His team ran into some trouble on the way, but they handled it! Genma-kun was hurt, but his injuries aren't serious and he'll be out of the hospital in a couple of days!" Gai had stopped by the hospital during his run and reported back to Dai who was happy to spread the good news.

"I'm glad," Sakumo said. He didn't look glad exactly; he wasn't smiling, but for the first time since Dai had begun working with him, Sakumo looked like someone who had an idea what a smile was and might actually capable of producing one himself some day.

_He was worried…_

"Thank you." Dai reached out. Gently, he put his hand on Sakumo's shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. "Really, thank you."

Sakumo nodded, his eyes skirting Dai's face. "I have to…" He stepped back and Dai's hand slid off his shoulder, brushing the thin fabric of his t-shirt which in turn, Dai imagined, brushed the pale skin beneath.

"Goodnight," he called as Sakumo vanished behind the closing door.

* * *

Dai couldn't sleep. He tossed and turned on his thin futon, his mind too occupied with Gai to find some rest. He knew he had to do something for his son, but he had no idea what. His well of fatherly wisdom seemed to have dried up.

The more he thought about it the more he worried that there wasn't anything he could do. Maybe Gai had to work through this on his own. As much as Dai hated the idea, he did understand that perhaps there were things in life a growing boy had to figure out himself.

However, no matter what he did, no matter what he told himself, he couldn't get it out of his head. Gai saying, _It was nothing. He wasn't that strong._

Gai's bare fists, clenched tight.

When he squeezed his eyes shut he was haunted by images of Gai tearing off blood-soaked bandages and tossing them into a flickering campfire.

_Weren't you a tiny baby just a moment ago? How did you grow up so fast?_

He rolled over, flopping on his back and staring at the ceiling.

_Gai…_

He didn't know how long he lay there, his thoughts circling in endless cycles of torment. He might even have dozed for a bit, until the soft creak of the floorboards in the hallway alerted him to the small figure creeping past the open living-room door.

"Gai?" Dai sat up on his futon and blinked. Pale moonlight painted Gai's shadow on the floor. He was standing in the doorway, one hand on the frame, hesitant. "What's wrong? Did you have a bad dream?"

"No… It's nothing... I just wanted to get a glass of water." Gai was a bad liar, always had been. Even in the relative darkness of their apartment, Dai could see him fidget.

"Ah…" There was no sadness quite like the one a father felt upon realizing his son didn't think he could come to him with his problems. "Are you sure?"

"I'm fine. I'm not a little kid!" The vehemence of Gai's reaction only saddened Dai further. What was so bad about being a kid? The Springtime of Youth was the most precious part of life!

He shook his head.

"I know. Grown-ups have nightmares, too, though. I had one just now."

"Really?" Gai padded a little closer. "So it doesn't stop?" He was frowning. In the white light his skin looked almost as pale as Sakumo's.

"No, people never stop being afraid."

"No matter how strong they get?"

"No matter how strong they get."

"Why?"

Dai wanted to give Gai a deep and meaningful answer, but what was there to say? All he had for his son was an apologetic smile. "I don't know."

"Oh," Gai said. He'd stopped next to Dai's futon and stood there, his arms dangling, striped in shadows.

In the darkness Dai lifted the edge of his blanket, allowing Gai to crawl in and snuggle close.


	12. Chapter 12

Dai woke up with Gai's warm weight on his chest, the sun streaming in through the window. He blinked against the brightness. His brain still addled with sleep, he needed a few seconds to realize that he'd overslept. A glance at the alarm clock he'd put on the floor next to his futon confirmed his suspicion. 9:24 blinked the digital display.

If it hadn't been for Gai, Dai would have jumped out of bed, thrown on his clothes and run for the Hokage Tower immediately, but with Gai sleeping on top of him, his eyes moving under his eyelids, chasing dreams, Dai let himself sink back into his pillow. He took a deep breath and smiled wistfully.

For all that had happened the previous day, Dai felt relaxed. Gai was with him; he was healthy and strong and—

And he'd killed someone with his own hands. Dai looked at them. They were small but strong, calloused from Gai's vigorous training. Still, you couldn't deny that they were the hands of a boy.

Dai traced his son's knuckles with the tip of his index finger. The skin there was hard and chapped like tree bark. As a taijutsu user he could translate that roughness of broken and healed-over skin into hours and hours of punches thrown at the wooden posts on the training grounds.

Gai stirred under his gentle touch and groaned when Dai put his hands on his son's narrow shoulders.

"Papa…? What time is it?" he mumbled.

"Half past nine," Dai said, holding on to the now tense form in his arms. "There's no need to— _There's no need to hurry_ was what he'd wanted to say. But Gai let out a cry that sounded like "Waah!" and leapt like a tiger off the futon.

"I'm going to be late for training!"

Dai closed his eyes to the _patpatpat_ of his son's bare feet slapping the floor. The warm spot on his chest where Gai had slept was slowly cooling.

* * *

"Sit. Eat. You can't start your day by rushing out of the house without breakfast!" He'd used the few minutes Gai had taken to get dressed to prepare his son's breakfast cereal. Only, Gai had merely darted into the kitchen, made a grab for a banana and was already on his way out.

Not on his watch!

He folded his arms and gave his son a deep and meaningful look full of fatherly concern.

"But I'm late, I'm late, I'm _late_!" Gai was dancing around by the kitchen door, hopping from one foot to the other as if he had to go the bathroom. "Sensei will be mad!"

"Let her be mad. You're already late; a few more minutes won't make a difference! You can make up for it by running extra laps around the training field! That's a good workout!" He flashed Gai a smile and thumbs up and when his son shot him a dubious glance, Dai marched over, grabbed him by the shoulders and steered him towards the table.

"I'm not that hungry…" Gai's protests only made Dai's grip firmer. He pushed Gai down into the chair.

"Eat. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day!"

He'd chopped fruit for Gai's cereal, apples and pears and bananas and oranges, just how Gai liked it best. The way Gai stared at his bowl now though made concern flare up in Dai's heart. Of course he knew what was on Gai's mind, but that didn't make it easier.

Dai sat down and picked up his spoon. He'd made cereal for himself as well and he was determined to set a good example by wolfing it all down. And maybe it would be good keep his mouth full at all times, so he wouldn't have to think of something to say…

No, that was the way of a coward!

So angry with himself that he nearly choked on his mouthful of cereal, Dai slammed his spoon down on the table. Gai glanced up at him guiltily; he'd not touched his breakfast yet.

"How are you feeling?" Dai asked. He hoped his voice projected concern and understanding while also seeming casual and down to earth, so as not to make Gai feel as if he'd done something horrible.

"Fine."

Not even a real reply! Dai's heart ached. He felt cut off from his son, like there was a wall between them all of a sudden, an insurmountable obstacle that left them both alone, each of them fending for himself. Such an unbearable thought!

"Gai…" If only he had the words to say… the perfect words to make it all better…

Glumly, Gai dragged his spoon through his bowl of cereal, making little waves in the milk. The blood had been washed off and his knuckles were covered by fresh white bandages. Dai swallowed against the sudden lump in his throat.

_Please talk to me…_ he thought, desperate to bridge the gap.

As if Gai had heard his father's plea, he suddenly looked up, his eyes heartbreakingly big and troubled. "What was it like?" he asked. Even in their small kitchen his voice didn't seem to take up any space. "The first time you… you know?"

"I—" Dai swallowed again. Cold sweat was running down his spine. Of all the questions Gai could have asked—But he should have seen this one coming. What could he say?

Fearful expectation was written on Gai's face. His cute brows were furrowed. His spoon hung limply in his bowl, forgotten. Dai could see Gai chewing on his lower lip.

_What was it like?_

How could he answer this question when he didn't know because _he'd never—_

Never killed anyone.

Maito Dai had never killed anyone. In all his years as a genin, he'd never had to do it. Not even during the war, when he'd been used as a messenger for his incredible speed and almost nonexistent and therefore hard to detect chakra signature.

No, he'd never done it.

But Gai had.

Gai, his nine year old son, had taken a person's life and now he was looking to his father for advice and his father didn't have anything to give him because he was just a genin with very little actual battle experience.

For the first time in his life, Dai felt like a failure.

* * *

By the time he made it to the Hatake house, it was around noon. Not that Dai cared that he was late. He had bigger concerns.

Like his son.

Like the fact that he hadn't been honest with Gai. Like the fact that when Gai had come to him for honest, heartfelt advice, he, Maito Dai!, had distracted him and changed the topic like a coward! What kind of father was he?

So he'd told Gai, _You did the right thing! You protected your friends! I'm proud of you!_ all the while avoiding Gai's initial question.

But although he did mean the lines, they flowed from his mouth like stale platitudes and left a bitter aftertaste.

He just couldn't do it.

He couldn't say, _I don't know what you're going through, my son, because I never had to go through it myself. I was always lucky. But I love you and I'm here for you. And I hope you don't think less of me._

Dai moved on autopilot, he'd spent hours at home, after Gai had left for the training grounds, cleaning and doing mundane tasks, his body heavy, suffused in a visceral sort of shame. It had taken everything to motivate himself to go to the Hokage tower and get the paperwork. He'd expected remarks on his tardiness from the paperwork nin, but they didn't say anything. They barely glanced up, handing him the documents wordlessly with one hand, the other already busy with more important stuff.

He opened the gate which elicited the by now familiar creak and made his way through the garden, the sun beating down on his shoulders. It was a golden autumn day, one Dai would have enjoyed immensely under normal circumstances.

As is it was, he was dragging his feet a little, shoulders somewhat slumped, eyes downcast. His mission felt like nothing but a chore today.

He didn't notice Kakashi until they almost ran into each other and Kakashi yelled, "Oi, don't get in my way!" at him.

Dai flinched when the boy shot past, running for a tree. Kakashi didn't stop; he planted his feet on the bark and, flailing for a split second, found no foothold. With a gasp the boy tumbled onto the grass.

"You need to be faster, Kakashi!"

Dai looked up, even more startled now. He didn't know that he'd ever heard _that_ voice sound so… alive.

At first he couldn't believe his eyes. He blinked, the sunlight bright, prone to creating mirages. But the image didn't change.

Hatake Sakumo sitting on the stone steps in front of his house. A large white wolf lay behind him in the shadow of the roof, flicking its ears and staring at Dai.

Sakumo was shielding his eyes with one hand and when he spotted Dai he nodded without any sign of hostility.

"Dai."

_Maybe he's just not much of a morning person_ , Dai thought. It was an absurd thing to think, of course, considering the way Sakumo had behaved during the short time he'd known him, but Dai was too stumped to come up with anything to explain this sudden change.

He stopped in front of Sakumo. Unable to think of anything to do or say, Dai stood around awkwardly like a delivery person who'd been told he had the wrong address. The wolf glared at him, but – to Dai's endless shock – Sakumo merely scooted to make room for him on the steps.

He sat down and followed Sakumo's gaze. Kakashi was taking another run at the tree.

"He asked me to train with him," Sakumo said as if that explained everything.

Dai watched as Kakashi repeated his attempt to scale the tree and failed.

They sat in silence for a bit.

When the kid had landed on his butt for the fifth time, Dai ventured a question.

"Why isn't he using chakra?"

The corner of Sakumo's mouth quirked. Dai stared at Sakumo's profile; the sun was giving his pale skin a warm, ethereal glow. Even Sakumo's hair looked less ghostly, his bangs falling into his eyes, which crinkled at the corners when he smiled that nanosecond smile. For the first time in a long time, Sakumo looked nice and kind and lovable. Like the day they'd met in front of the academy.

" _Your son_ doesn't need to use chakra to do a back flip off a wall or tree."

"No, but Gai's chakra control isn't very good – he takes after his old man in that regard." Dai chuckled sheepishly. "So this way is actually easier for him. For a kid with excellent chakra control like Kakashi-kun… It's not really something he has to master – although it can't hurt, of course."

"He wants to be able to do it because he saw Gai-kun do it when they last fought. He would never admit it, but the idea that there's something Gai-kun can do that he can't really annoys Kakashi." This time it was Sakumo who chuckled. When he looked at Dai, the smile on his face lasted more than a split second.

"Youthful rivalries…" Dai said wistfully. He'd never expected an exchange with Sakumo of all people to warm his heart like this.

"Kakashi… being a chuunin, he constantly works with adults. He has a lot of opportunities to learn from them. And then there is Minato-kun, who is an outstanding shinobi and teacher. However… I think there are some things he can't learn that way. So I'm glad he has Gai-kun. I think there are a lot of things your son can teach Kakashi."

Dai had to swallow. His eyes were burning with unshed tears. Such a splendid person! Such wonderful, inspiring words!

"Sakumo-san…" His tongue nearly tripped over the name.

"Don't be so formal, please."

"Your words have touched me deeply!" Dai cried, ready to fling himself into Sakumo's arms for a manly embrace.

"Ah… Dai? Sakumo held up a hand as if he was bracing himself for a collision. He scooted away, putting a little bit of distance between himself and Dai. "Is everything alright?"

"No!" The word burst out of him, a small explosion. He took a breath to calm himself and, more in control but still upset, said, "No, I did something horrible today! I _lied_ to my son!" And before he could do anything about it, the whole story spilled out of him in one breathless rush.

* * *

When he was done talking, Sakumo looked at him and, squinting in the bright sunlight, nodded slowly, contemplatively.

"…I see," he said. "It's a difficult situation. But you didn't really lie."

"No, it's the same thing. I should have come clean. I should have told him…"

_That we're different now. That he'll be going places where I can't follow._

Sakumo shook his head. "I was seven. Kakashi was five. It wasn't the same for him; I could tell. It's never the same. In a way, I'd tried to prepare him. I used to take him hunting, out in the forest. I wanted to teach him how to kill." Sakumo paused, his gaze seeking Kakashi in the distance. The boy had changed his training method and was now pelting the poor tree with kunai as if it was an especially loathsome enemy.

A frown had appeared on Sakumo's face. He's was looking at Kakashi, but his pupils weren't tracking the boy's movements. Dai wondered what he was seeing.

When he spoke again, Sakumo's voice was sharper. "No, not how, _why._ We hunted for food; I taught him to kill to survive. You had to be hungry or in danger to—" Shaking his head again, sadly this time, he interrupted himself. "There has to be a reason. For death. There has to be a reason. If there is another way, you can't just—"

He coughed, cleared his throat and looked away, past Kakashi towards the dark clouds on the horizon. "I'm sorry. I think I'm a little under the weather." With that he made to get up, but Dai grabbed his wrist.

"Wait! Don't—"

There was growl behind him, a deadly, low rumble like rocks sliding overhead. Dai let go and turned around. Fangs bared, the wolf was staring at him.

"Shiro." One word from Sakumo and the wolf put his head down on his paws. Its eyes remained on Dai, though.

"I'm sorry," they both said at the same time, Dai looking up at Sakumo, who'd gotten on his feet, and Sakumo looking down at him.

Sakumo averted his eyes first.

"I'd better go inside. Thank you for delivering the documents." Sakumo took a step towards the house, something Dai needed to prevent. They'd just had a beautiful bonding moment! It couldn't end like this!

He jumped up.

"But—No – I-" He was reaching for the right words; they were there! And if he just said them, Sakumo would smile again! He wasn't quite sure why, but he wanted to see that smile again. "Sakumo! What you said to me—Your words – I'm grateful! Thank you for—Thank you for your support!" That old familiar line… It had slipped out if his mouth all by itself. Dai blinked, shocked at himself. Had he ever said this in reply to actual kindness?

"Goodbye." Sakumo dipped his head and ducked past the wolf into his house like a fugitive, leaving Dai standing on the steps, the white wolf blocking the entry of the house. It didn't raise its head or show its teeth but its gaze said, _just try getting past me_ more clearly than any words could have.

There was a _thwack_ from the garden as one of Kakashi's kunai struck true.

Unconsciously Dai flexed the fingers of his right hand, the memory of Sakumo's pulse fluttering under his fingertips already fading.

* * *

"I'll tell Gai you said hi!" he called to Kakashi as he walked past, waving for emphasis.

Kakashi didn't turn around to look at him, but the kid froze as if he'd been struck by lightning. Just for a second he stood perfectly still, kunai poised, ready to strike.

"I don't know anyone with that name," Kakashi said, his voice completely flat.

Then he threw and the weapon buried itself deep in the tree trunk, just slightly off-center.


	13. Chapter 13

When Dai got back from his training a few hours after his visit to the Hatake house, Gai was already home, doing handstands in the hallway.

“Sensei said she had something to do,” he explained unasked, “and that we should go visit Genma at the hospital or something.”

Instantly Dai’s day brightened. While he had been running in the forest, his mind had been too preoccupied with Gai and the way his conversation with Sakumo had ended to properly focus on training. But going to the hospital would be a good distraction.

Not to mention that Samayako might be there…

“That’s a great idea!” He clapped Gai on the shoulder, grinning. “I just need to take a shower first.” With that he was out in the hallway, ready for a quick wash-up and then the hospital. “We’re going to have to get Genma a present too!” he shouted over his shoulder at Gai who’d followed him to the doorway and was standing there looking like a pale paper cutout of his usual self.

* * *

 

Dai showered and trimmed his beard and put on some of the reasonably priced cologne he’d bought for special occasions. He was fighting for his good mood like it was enemy territory he had to retake. If Gai was sad, he had to work twice as hard to be cheerful and supportive!

He left the communal bathroom on their floor and strode back into the apartment, where Gai was waiting, a cute frown on his cute face.

“Can we go now?” Gai asked, already shuffling his feet as if warming up for the steps he was about to take.

“In a minute.” Dai put his hands on his hips and puffed out his chest. He steeled himself for judgment. “How do I look?”

“What do you mean?”

He puffed out his chest a little more and gave Gai his brightest grin. “On a scale of one to ten, ten being the best, how handsome and manly do I look, Gai? Be honest!”

Clearly not quite sure what was expected of him, Gai scrunched up his face. He studied Dai from top to bottom, perfectly coiffed hair to neatly trimmed toenails. Dai tried to look as impressive as possible.

“Umm… eight?” came Gai’s hesitant reply.

_Eight?!_

It was a punch to the gut.

Dai stumbled, clutching his chest. He’d been hit right in the ego.

“Eight?!” he gasped. “Papa was aiming for twenty-nine!”

“But you said on a scale from one to ten…” protested Gai. He looked so anguished that Dai had to fall to his knees in front of his son and gently put his hands on his shoulders.

“Gai, on a scale from one to ten, you always have to aim higher than ten!”

“I see…”

“Tell me, in terms of rivalry intensity with Kakashi-kun, on a scale from one to ten, what’s your goal?” he asked solemnly.

Again Gai scrunched up his face, his shoulders tensing under Dai’s hands. Seconds ticked by as the wheels turned in the boy’s head. Dai felt his own suspense rise. He had no idea what Gai’s reply would be, but he couldn’t wait to hear it!

Gai swallowed, gathering his courage.

Then, his jaw set, he looked Dai in the eye and shouted, “Three thousand!”

_What a perfect, magnificent reply!_

“Gai…” He couldn’t have stopped himself, even if he’d wanted to! Deeply touched, Dai wrapped his arms around his son and smushed him against his chest. “You’re the most inspiring son a father could wish for!” Tears were gathering in the corners of his eyes.

“Papa…” Gai squirmed a little in his embrace. “Can we go to the hospital now?”

“Sure.” He let go of his son and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “Let’s go.”

* * *

 

Armed with chocolates and a brightly colored get well soon card, Dai still felt his heart flutter as he and Gai approached Genma’s room at the hospital and they heard the kid’s breathless voice floating down the corridor, “Ow, Mum, stop, don’t make me laugh! It hurts!”

Through the closed door, Samayako’s reply reached Dai’s ears as a soft murmur with a high, playful inflection. He couldn’t make out the words, but was instantly charmed by how lovely she sounded.

He had to gather himself before he could knock. Dai took a deep breath. He combed his hand through his hair, smoothing it, and then, finally, raised a fist to rap on the wood.

“Come in!”

When Dai pulled the door open, there was Samayako, smiling. She sat in a chair next to Genma’s bed, her hand resting on her son’s right wrist. With her hair pulled back into a stub of a ponytail she looked as lovely as ever. “Dai! Gai! Why, how nice of you to stop by!” She laughed again. “That rhymes; almost sounded like a poem, don’t you think?”

“Don’t be silly, Mom…” groaned Genma who was sitting propped up in bed. He looked at them and mustered a vague smile. Dai could see the white bandages peeking out from under his thin hospital gown. “Hey,” the boy greeted them without much enthusiasm.

“Hey, Genma. Um, we brought you something.” Gai slipped the card and the box of chocolates out of Dai’s loose grip and brought them over to his teammate.

“Cool.” After no more than a quick glance, Genma put his presents on the nightstand.

“Manners, kiddo!” Samayako punched her son lightly on the arm.

“Ouch,” he mumbled, then nodded at his visitors. “Thank you, Dai-san; thanks, Gai.”

“Better.” Samayako grinned. Her white teeth seemed to light up the room. “Thank you for coming! Why don’t you have a seat?”

“Ah, we don’t mean to impose…” Of course, Dai was only being polite. He couldn’t wait to spend time with Samayako. They’d never really had the opportunity before, despite their sons being on the same Genin squad. But now he was in her beautiful presence and planning to bask in it!

“Oh? Well, bye then!” Samayako’s jolly exclamation almost made Dai’s heart stop. She grinned at him and winked. “Just kidding! Come on, sit down!”

Relieved, Dai dragged another chair over from the far corner of the room. After a moment’s hesitation he placed it next to the empty one on the left side of Genma’s bed. Samayako was sitting on the opposite side.

“How are you doing, Genma-kun?” Dai asked as Gai plopped down into the chair next to him.

“Pretty much okay. My ribs only hurt when I laugh. Thankfully, my mom’s jokes are so stale that that never happens.”

“Hey! You were laughing, Mister, I heard you.”

“Only because your jokes are so lame that it’s kinda funny just _how_ lame they are!”

“ _Please,_ we both know I’m hilarious.”

Mother and son had slipped so easily into this exchange. Dai knew they weren’t excluding their guests on purpose, but he did feel like Gai and he were intruding. He swallowed that feeling. It was only natural, after all, that single parents and their children formed this kind of impenetrable unit, he thought.

But then, it was nice to just sit and listen to them talk for a bit.

* * *

 

“How about you come with me tonight?” Dai asked once they were out on the street, walking back home at a leisurely pace. Gai was next to him, head bent, looking at his feet. The cloud of dark thoughts looming over him was almost palpable.

When he heard Dai’s question, though, he snapped to attention. “With you? To Kakashi’s house?”

“Yes.” The idea had come to Dai while they were still in Genma’s hospital room and he was watching the boy and his mother. The ease of their relationship, the fun, had painfully reminded him of Sakumo and Kakashi whose few interactions that Dai had witnessed so far had lacked just that. Maybe spending time with Gai would help draw Kakashi out of his shell. And what could have a bigger positive effect on a father than seeing his son happy?

“Is it really okay if I come?” Gai’s face was a battleground for anxiety and hope. Dai was instantly touched by how much this seemed to mean to his boy.

“Of course!” he said quickly, already speeding up his pace. “We can go right now! It’s practically on the way anyway!”

It wasn’t, not really, but Dai was suddenly filled with boundless enthusiasm, a plan forming in his mind, mapping out the glorious evening they’d have with Sakumo and Kakashi.

* * *

The first ripple of doubt reached Dai when they came to a stop in front of the gate to the garden. A faint blush of evening light had appeared on the horizon and as Dai laid a heavy hand on the rusty metal he very nearly sighed.

Gai was carrying a bag of groceries they’d picked up on the way while Dai dutifully had the files pinned under his arm. He glanced at Gai, using the sight of his hopeful son to steel himself. If they were rejected today, Dai told himself, it would be a good lesson on perseverance for Gai.

Then he pushed the gate open and they walked together through the garden towards the silent house.

* * *

 

At the door to the house, that thin barrier of flimsy wood his bare fist could have penetrated without much effort, Dai felt the ripples at the bottom of his stomach, his guts pushing up against his heart. If Gai hadn’t been right there next to him, he would have turned around then and there, but then, if Gai hadn’t been next to him, he would have had no reason to be nervous in the first place, would he?

Cursing his weakness, Dai raised his knuckles for a powerful, energetic knock, imagining how the sound he would make would startle Sakumo out of his strange trance and back into life. His hand was still in the air when the door slid open and Kakashi peeked out.

“Oh, it’s you,” the boy said, his voice flat as ever. Then his gaze drifted past Dai to Gai and he sighed softly, “and you brought _him_.”

“Kakashi--!” The name burst out of Gai’s mouth, but Kakashi merely shushed him.

“Don’t be so noisy. Dad’s inside making dinner. He said to tell you to come in.” With a slight frown directed at Gai he added, “I guess that means you too.”

“Thank you,” Dai said. He was only slowly recovering from the surprise and it took him a second to remember to lower his fist. The sky darkening around them, he and Gai were standing frozen in place, both of them somewhat in shock. He’d expected rejection and now they were invited in for dinner? Sakumo was cooking…

Come to think of it, Dai could actually smell the faint aroma of miso in the air. A father cooking for his son; it was heartwarming – it meant that Sakumo was better, that he would be okay in the long run, Dai was sure of that!

“Are you coming or not?” Kakashi had pushed the door open wide and was staring at them expectantly, his grey eyes darting over to Gai. There was the hint of a challenge in that look and that was enough to shake Gai out of whatever state he was in.

“Of course, Rival!” he shouted and grabbed his father’s dangling hand. “Come on, Dad!”

As he was dragged across the threshold by his son, Dai had strangest feeling. All the while he’d thought that they needed saving, Kakashi and Sakumo, but now, as he entered the warm house, Gai’s strong fingers wrapped around his, and breathed in the scent of Sakumo’s cooking, it felt to Dai like they were the ones being saved.

Gai and him.


End file.
